Alternate headline: FURTHER PROOF LIFE NOT FAIR
Lost in the retarded publicity stunt that was putting Marge Simpson on the cover of this month’s Playboy (honestly, to anyone who buys Playboy for the promise of seeing a naked Marge Simpson… let’s never hang out) was the alternate cover featuring Victoria’s Secret model Alina Puscau. Who’s Alina Puscau, you ask? Why, she’s Brett Ratner’s girlfriend, and he shot the cover and her pictorial. That’s right, when he’s not breathlessly tweeting from a Jonas Bros concert, butchering the English language, or directing terrible movies, Brett Ratner sleeps with a Victoria’s Secret model. Allegedly. Normally I’m highly in favor of looking at pictures of naked women, but imagining this girl’s body with the Rat Man’s nacho cheese-stained paws all over it is a total boner killer. I wonder if they paint each other’s nails and talk about Miley records. (I guaran-goddamn-tee you Brett Ratner refers to all celebrities by first name only, just dying for someone to ask who he means.)
Reached for comment, Brett Ratner just sent me this:
I want more like this!
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