Now You Can Die Of Dysentery On Facebook

Zynga is about to unveil their next game poised to addict your mom and wear out your “hide application” clicking finger.  TechCrunch got a look at the game, survived the ordeal, and emerged back into the light, neck-bearded and eager to relate the tale:

Next up is FrontierVille, if the screenshots I saw while logged in to Facebook as a Developer Test Account are to be believed.  The game description? Click and then keep clicking. Ok, not really. It’s “Howdy Pardner! Let’s explore a new life on the frontier. You gotta chop trees to construct buildings, clear land to raise livestock, plant crops, and raise a family. The untamed wilderness is hazardous, but your fellow pioneers are there to help.”  Milestones include things like “learned the ropes,” “just broke ground for a new homestead!,” and “just finished building a General Store in FrontierVille.” [TechCrunch]

This game has been in the works since at least January of this year (much longer than was spent on

version 1.0 of Farmville), which suggests this game might either be very large or had development problems.  One thing’s for certain, I’ll still be playing “Freddy Pharkas: Frontier Pharmacist” on an old Tandy instead.  Is FrontierVille going to task users with catching horse farts in a paper bag?  Yeah, didn’t think so.