Rodents Of Unusual Size Are In Central Park?

We find it as shocking as you that a city as polite and clean as New York would have a problem with rodents at all, but rats the size of big fluffy bunnies are invading Central Park. It’s only a matter of time before huge jets of fire start erupting at random, a problem normally only encountered in the Upper East Side as another snob is pulled into hell after accidentally fulfilling his contract with Satan.

In all seriousness, what’s funny about this is the fact that everybody is blaming somebody else while the city itself is insisting there’s no actual problem, like people seeing massive rats isn’t something they might want to look into. Look, just hire the Dread Pirate Roberts, guys. He knows how to handle this.

[ via the buttercups at The Mary Sue ]