So, remember a few days ago when PETA put out a gory Mario parody, “Super Tanooki Skin 2D” and most gamers were like “uhhh, a Tanooki isn’t a real thing guys. Also a lot of kids play the games you’re throwing digital red paint on. This is kind of offensive”?
Well, PETA has responded to the gamer blowback, and it turns out the only person you should be upset with is yourself for not having a sense of humor. After the jump PETA media coordinator Shakira Croce helpfully explains why this whole controversy is actually your fault…
“Mario fans: Relax! PETA’s game was meant to be tongue-in-cheek, a fun way to call attention to a serious issue, that raccoon dogs are skinned alive for their fur. We wish real-life tanukis could fly or swat enemies away with their tails and escape from those who profit from their skins. You can help them by never buying real fur.”
See? It was all just a joke! Although you should still definitely feel terrible about animals being skinned alive. Definitely. Also, apparently the folks at PETA continue to confuse the legendary flying creature Mario’s suit is based on with real-life animals. I could throw Kanye West’s Twitter feed into a food processor and come out with something less garbled than this response.
Listen PETA, it’s time to decide what kind or organization you want to be. You’d never catch a Third World aid organization making a stupid parody game where Kirby eats African kids’ food. You’d never see the American Cancer Society launch an “I’d rather show my tits than not get a mammogram” advertising campaign. Why? Because they realize these kind of publicity stunts can only belittle their cause. PETA’s core message is supposedly “humans and animals are equals, and thus the ethical treatment of animals is a serious issue”, but your own treatment of the issue is anything but serious. It’s a good thing your animal pals can’t talk, because they might have a thing or two to say about your irreverent attitude towards their suffering.
But maybe I’m wrong, maybe stupid parody video games are the way to go and the issue is just that PETA is choosing the wrong games to target. Mario and Cooking Mama are about as inoffensive as games get — if PETA wants to make a stand we’ve got some more suitable games for them to tackle. Hit page two to find out what they are.




PETA stands for Poorly Educated Teen Activists, right?
They are also against eating beaver, which is just stupid.
Do you have any idea how many dens of wolves, packs of boars, and roaming hordes of endangered species in Middle Earth have fallen to my axe so I can make a critical success version of a cloak from a Wooly Mammoth?
The auction hall on Lord of the Rings Online is akin to a virtual slaughterhouse with stacks of hundreds of furs and leathers. I personally have at least 100 in my vault.
PETA is a joke. They are a bunch of hypocrite idiots. They actually kill any animal they deem ‘un-adoptable’ In fact, here’s something I just found.
The following story is from This is True dated 17 July 2005. It is Copyright 2005 Randy Cassingham, all rights reserved, and reprinted here with permission:
“Ethical” Defined
After more than 100 dead dogs were dumped in a trash dumpster over four weeks, police in Ahoskie, N.C., kept an eye on the trash receptacle behind a supermarket. Sure enough, a van drove up and officers watched the occupants throw in heavy plastic bags. They detained the two people in the van and found 18 dead dogs in plastic bags in the dumpster, including puppies; 13 more dead dogs were still in the van. Police say the van is registered to the headquarters of People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, and the two occupants, Andrew B. Cook, 24, and Adria Joy Hinkle, 27, identified themselves as PETA employees. An autopsy performed on one of the dogs found it was healthy before it was killed. Police say PETA has been picking up the animals — alive — from North Carolina animal shelters, promising to find them good homes. Cook and Hinkle have been charged with 62 felony counts of animal cruelty. In response to the arrests PETA President Ingrid Newkirk said it’s against the group’s policy for employees to dump animals in the trash, but “that for some animals in North Carolina, there is no kinder option than euthanasia.” (Roanoke-Chowan News-Herald) …Oops, my mistake: that’s “Playing God” Defined.
In his author’s notes section, Cassingham had more to say about this story:
PETA is pointless