So, you might have heard that there are a whole bunch of ending spoilers circulating about “The Avengers”, courtesy of io9.
We’ve read them and we’re…politely skeptical. Oh, heck, we’re impolitely skeptical. Especially since almost all of this reads like what a desperate fanboy wants to see in the movie, instead of what will actually be there.
So, let’s take a look at these “spoilers”, and make fun of them. And also io9, since they’d have realized this was B.S. with ten seconds worth of Googling.
Here are the “spoilers”:
-The aliens are called The Redacted and are a new version of The Skrulls. Fox still own Skrulls, so Marvel have changed them enough to not get sued. They’re multicoloured and are shapeshifters.
-Thanos is in the movie. There were rumors some months ago that Loki would do business with Thanos and they’re true. Thanos is tricked by Loki in the movie. Basically, Loki has been collecting Infinity Gems and the Infinity Gauntlet, but tricks Thanos in to thinking that the Infinity Gauntlet is the most powerful. In return, Thanos gives him The Redacted.
-The Leviathan is an alien serpent given to Loki by Thanos as a part of the deal.
-Red Skull is in the movie. Loki meets him on his travels. They split the 6 Infinity Gems between them. Loki takes the Mind, Reality and Power gems and Red Skull takes the Soul, Time and Space gems.
-The Redacted discover that Loki tricked their master, and betray him. Hence Loki seemingly being on The Avengers side in some set photos.
Your first hint this is BS right off the bat is the fact that, uh, Marvel still owns the rights to the Skrulls. So all this stuff about “The Redacted” is either garbage or this guy got a dummy script. It wouldn’t surprise us if the Skrulls were actually in the movie, though; they are a major Avengers villain, after all.
Similarly, why would Thanos and the Infinity Gems be involved in this script? Marvel has gone out of its way to set up the Cosmic Cube as the key McGuffin here. Why bring in a new one that you haven’t established with the audience who, let’s remember, are overwhelmingly not Marvel comics fans? Does anybody even still care about the Infinity Gauntlet anymore anyway?
That said, we wouldn’t be surprised if the Red Skull and Hydra at least played a minor role in this movie. It’s the Cosmic Cube. At the very least, there will be a passing reference or an end-of-the-movie cookie featuring him, because, well, he’s the freakin’ Red Skull. But there weren’t scenes shot “in secret”. Are you kidding?
Anyway, enjoy people frothing over the fanfic.
[ tip of the hat, mockingly, to io9 ]
I want more like this!
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