So, you’re a coastal state. However you feel about climate change, there are certain immutable facts that you have to deal with, like rising sea levels that will cause serious problems. Do you work on handling the inevitable, or do you pass the legal equivalent of “no u” to scientists pointing out the water is, uh, starting to rise?
If you’ve read the headline, you’ve probably figured out what North Carolina’s fine legislators are trying to do.
You might be wondering what they’re thinking and the answer is…money! The bill would require sea level rates to be determined using only historical data from after 1900, which would indicate a rise of eight inches. This is highly pleasing to coastal developers, who really do not want to hear that the sea will, according to science, rise by about a meter, because that means they can’t sell coastal homes to rich people and then run away with their money really fast. For those of you playing the home game, that would be roughly five times as high of a rise in sea levels as predicted by the law currently on the table.
So, basically, North Carolina and its fine politicians believe if they plug their ears and scream loudly enough, the laws of nature will magically reverse themselves. The moral of the story? Don’t buy coastal property in North Carolina.
image of the Galileo eye-roll via tonynetone on Flickr




Now if we can just stop women from voting…. North Carolina, experience 1882 today!
I’m surprised that North Carolina hasn’t mandated that coastal homes must be bought by gay couples.
Also, never start a land war in Asia.
“”How dare you!” Canute shouted. “Ocean, turn back now! I have ordered you to retreat before me, and now you must obey! Go back!”
And in answer another wave swept forward and curled around the king’s feet.”
Somehow I think the idiots in North Carolina wouldn’t learn anything thing from King Canute…
And what’s the time frame of this one-meter rise? Wait, it doesn’t matter, does it? Whenever it happens, it will have been God’s will, anyway. No sense trying to prepare yourself for that. Hey, are we sure this flood hasn’t already been averted by the gay marriage ban? Surely that must’ve at least won NC a few points with the Big Man.
Next up for North Carolina — Denying Gravity — How the Liberal Elite are trying to keep you from flying like God intended!