In probably the biggest upset of this entire bracket, “Threshold” not only lost against “Profit and Lace”, it got spanked. Totaling up the votes I got, “Profit and Lace” got two votes for every one on “Threshold”.
So, it all comes down to this. Which is worse? “These are The Voyages…”, Enterprise’s series finale, or “Profit and Lace”, DS9′s gender-bending Quark episode?
We’re giving you two days for this one: argue your points, post screencaps, do whatever you have to do to demonstrate why one is worse than the other.
Tell us in the comments or on Facebook: we’ll have a final summation and announce the winner Wednesday.
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Voyages took us to the worst point ever- that of no return. There was no chance for redemption and for that it’ll get my final (frontier) vote.
Almost every single second of “Voyages…” was awful. The only part remotely enjoyable was the final scene featuring the three Enterprise captain voice-overs. And even that was only enjoyable partly due to it being the END of the episode. Why did Trip die? Who the hell were these aliens? Why were Mayweather and Hoshi STILL ensigns?! Why wasn’t Frakes forced to wear a girdle or something?!
“These Are The Voyages…” was just the worst… That’s my vote.
“Voyages…” was my original pony in this race and I stand by it. No amount of lens flare in the new movies will be able to make the franchise recover from that turd.
Holy hell, I would’ve never guessed “Lace” would win that one by a landslide. I’ll ride that pony all the way to the end though; no way was “Voyages…” as bad as Quark in drag. Bring us home, Ferengi!
“These are the Voyages…”
Now for my argument: OF COURSE “Profit and Lace” is objectively the worse episode, but it’s not the worst in the sense of the worst Trek episode and shouldn’t be the final of this.
Context matters for final judgements, and in this case the stakes and work involved in failing to make “These Are The Voyages…” an acceptable finale far outweigh the casual negligence that allowed “Profit and Lace”s script to actually be filmed (and that prevented any sane person from stopping it at any point during production).
I’m reminded of an old debate between Roger Ebert and Gene Siskel. One week they both reviewed the Robert DiNero movie “The Mission” and the fluff children’s film “Benji: The Hunted” (the one where Benji takes care of 4 mountain lion cubs, awwww). Ebert gave “The Mission” thumbs down, “Benji” thumbs up. Siskel accused him of basically saying Benji was the better movie. Ebert’s very correct response was that “The Mission” was aiming to be brilliant high drama and failed, but “Benji: The Hunted” was aiming to be a cute fluff children’s film and succeeded.
“Profit and Lace”, while awful and representing how much the Trek producers often couldn’t care less about either the fans or the show, is aiming to be a cheap comic relief farce. “These Are the Voyages…” is aiming to be the final thesis point of a four year drama, bringing in elements to respect the decades long history of Star Trek…and horribly, horribly, horribly failed.
These Are The Voyages
This would have been much tougher if Threshold had made it to the finals. Now, it’s easy:
Fat Riker & Fat Troi for the final win.
This is pure madness. Profit and Lace is the inferior episode. Plain and simple. Not only was it bad Star Trek, it was bad television. Voyages was bad final episode, and I see that that is overshadowing Profit and Lace which was just an episode in a season. If a plane crashes do we look at where the plane was going before we decide if it was a tragedy? Giving Voyages extra weight because it was the finale takes away from how bad Profit and Lace actually is.
Before you vote for Voyages think about this:
1) If you were forced to chose one episode, which would you rather watch?
2) P&L focuses on Quark, Rom, Zek & Moogie. Thats an all star list of shitty characters. It could only be worse if they threw in Lwaxana and Neelix.
3) There was actually a “funny” heart attack scene.
I definitely concede These are the Voyages took a massive crap on the last 2 seasons of progress, but Profit and Lace took a dump on everything Trek was supposed to stand for. Its sexist and ignorant. Quark learns nothing and is the exact same person he always was at the end of the episode. Even when he apologizes to the woman at the end its stated that he does so only because the hormones are still messing with him.
Profit and Lace should win this whole thing. I can see how people think Voyages was worse when using context but look past that and look at it as whats the worst episode. When looking at it from that standpoint Profit and Lace is the clear winner.
[synopse.startrek.cz]
Well stated, Fade, your zeal is undeniable. But context counts in my final tally. There was a steaming pile of Quark for many different episodes (and yes, this is the nadir), but only one shot at doing a fitting finale. Of the two episodes, I’m insulted by one and merely unamused by the other.
The picture Fadeproof linked to sealed the deal for me.
Profit and Lace is my vote.
Bah; no Threshold, no vote. You people are insane!
After I watched ‘These are the Voyages’ everything tasted like tinfoil for a week. Worst. Episode. Ever.
Profit and Lace was just dumb. It was a poor attempt at a funny episode as a break inbetween some action and drama. It was stupid but it was one episode out of 173.
These are the Voyages… was a Series Finale. It was the end of the series. The Next Generation brought back the Q-Trial from the first episode. Deep Space Nine ended a five-year arc with the Dominon and ended the series long story with Sisko and the Prophets. Voyager ended with them going home while defeating their series’ Big Bad.
Enterprise ended with Riker and Troi taking a tour of the NX-01 and us viewers returning to a story that we saw the conclusion to two decades ago.
That’s it. No character growth. No Journey’s End. Star Trek: Enterprise ended with “Pegasus Part 1 1/2″. The only saving grace would have been Archer’s speech. The speech that led the foundation of the United Federation of Planets would have been the perfect end to Enterprise, but instead we go back to Poochie 1 and 2 teasing us with “It was one hell of a speech. Now lets talk to Picard and tell him what I said 21 years ago.”
Rick Berman said that this episode was a valentine to the fan. Well then I can only thing of one response… (clears throat)
Rick Berman. Brannon Braga. What you’ve written… Is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. At no point, in your rambling, incoherent nonsense, were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone who watch this episode is now dumber for having watched it. I award you my vote for Worst Star Trek Episode Ever, and may God have mercy on your souls.
These are The Voyages…
I said it before, this was the final nail for a lot of diehards like me. Thanks Berman and Braga.
Just to clear the palate:
Eartha Kitt, Julie Newmar, Michelle Pfeiffer, Halle Berry, Anne Hathaway.
There are no losers in the Catwoman showdown. MEOW !
I still stand by “Turnabout Intruder.”
BUT. I agree with EVERYONE.
“Profit and Lace” is an example of a singularly terrible episode of Star Trek; from concept to execution, and then some. There is nothing redeeming about it whatsoever.
“These Are the Voyages…” is an example of a series finale going in the worst possible direction. There’s less to offend the senses than “Profit and Lace” IF everything is taken out of context. Instead, a bunch of shit gets slapped together and the creative thinks slapping a “hey look at the shiny guest stars” band-aid on it is going to distract from a lazy turd.
For that, I have to lean “These Are the Voyages…” despite being an anti-champion of “Qwark With Boobs” for most of the tourney. Even if you don’t hit a finale out of the park, you have to swing the bat, and “Voyages” never even twitched.
Seriously? These are the final two? I thought for sure Justice would “win” it all and Night would come a close second. Ignoring all you weirdos out there, I ENJOYED Profit and Lace, YES I really did. So by default I choose Voyages. Cause there is nothing else to choose, and it wasn’t even the worst. Honestly. In context, Enterprise was the worst series so it is somewhat fitting the finale was idiotic. As for Bragga’s “Valentine” I think he was just trying to gain some credibility back by pandering to all of you TNGers out there so I can’t really blame him. Neither should you. But that being said, I still tuned in to it for the sake of it being a Trek finale. Profit? I watch because I enjoy it. Hate me. I don’t care. I heart and support the Ferengi!
Destroy the heretic!!
[Secretly enjoyed "If Wishes were Horses"]
Psst! Its not a secret anymore, its on the internet
Nothing wrong with liking If Wishes were Horses. I personally like Night, so you could imagine my reaction when I found that I was in a minority of one.
Encounter at Farpoint.
I am swayed by both arguments. But I must say… “These are the Voyages…” is worse.
A series finale can go a LONG way toward fixing inequities of the series, plot holes, or at least just leaving you with a general good feeling of nostalgia. Naturally, this did not.
Also, since Football in the Groin wasn’t nominated.
You’re insane. I would vote for “Football in the Groin” for BEST episode. “In the Pale Moonlight” explores the spectrum of morality in the hard decisions made by men of conscience, but “Football in the Groin” has a football in the groin.
These Are the Voyages… Hear me out.
I’m not going to pretend that ‘Profit and Lace’ is anything other than a downright horrible episode on an otherwise good show. Quark was an annoying character to begin with (still better than Neelix, however…) and the attempt at comedy via a sex changing Ferengi is an idea that should have been left to the writer’s list of crap that never sees the light of day. It is awful. However, the awfulness of this episode in the greater scheme of 7 seasons of DS9 is minimized by the good and sometimes great episodes of a strong show all around. This is the problem with choosing ‘Profit and Lace’ as the worst of the worst. I would have forgotten about it had you not mentioned it or until I sat down to watch the series again. Hell, I had ‘Move Along Home’ as the worst of DS9. That episode actually makes me angry it is so irritating.
‘These Are The Voyages…’ is a different story. Enterprise limped along for over two seasons before Manny Coto started to right the ship. Many Trek fans never bought into the series; but it had its moments where you could see what it could become especially in the fourth, and ultimately final, season. So how was a fan such as myself rewarded for sticking with an uneven show for 97 episodes from ‘Broken Bow’ through ‘Terra Prime’? With a steaming pile of cutting room floor garbage courtesy of Berman and Braga. They may have had to cancel the show, but they couldn’t even give it a proper send off? To add insult to injury they make the final episode a holodeck episode (the weakest and lamest episodes from TNG, DS9 & VYG are almost always holodeck episodes. “Oh noes it malfunctioned again! What do we do?”) with Riker and Troi from a TNG episode. Berman described this episode as a “Valentine to the fans.” F**k you, man! Are you series? Lame holodeck episode? Check. Fat Riker and Troi in useless and annoying cameos? Check. Kill off Trip? Check? Nonsensical plot line? Check. *This* is going to be last episode of Trek on TV for a long while, if ever. Eighteen consecutive year of TV Trek and *this* is the episode to send off a franchise. What’s not to love?
For me, I will always remember ‘These Are The Voyages’ with bitterness and antipathy for the way they ended it. ‘Profit and Lace’ is a crap episode buried among 7 seasons of a good show. The least Berman and Braga could have done was attempt to give ENT a proper send off. Another early Federation plots would have been nice. Diving into the minutiae of Trek trivia and canon would have been welcome. They skimped and wrote and steaming pile of crap. Screw you Berman and Braga. I hope something you love catches on fire.
That didn’t look as long when I typed it in Word…
Not really a reply, but you wrote a lot and I want you to know that someone read it.
Thanks Fadeproof.
Can we have do Worst Trek Character next. I know the impulse reaction is to scream “Wesley!” and go into a rage coma, but I think Dr. Phlox, Neelix, Winn, Season-7 Dukat or Pulaski might pull off the upset.
Please forgive that first sentence; I forgot to turn my brain on today.
Dukat was a great character, and although we all hated Winn it was because we were supposed to hate her. The fact that everyone hated her is a credit to how good the character and actress was. The rest I agree with.
Agreed with Fadeproof here. But as much as I am annoyed or repulsed (haha) by all of the others above, the worst character must be and always will be from my beloved DS9, Ezri Dax. They took one of my all time favorite characters Jadzia Dax and turned her into a sniveling, space sick, weak shell of her former amazing host. Why even cast a replacement at all? Why not just turn one of the most compelling characters ever to walk the Promenade (hell, one of the best Trek characters ever) the series regular upgrade instead? Elim Garek. To me it was unforgivable. I guess the producers really just wanted to Bashir to nail a Dax.
I desperately want to vote for Profit And Lace, since I got the “Some Like it Quark” credit as well as the fact that Quarkette is a truly disturbing image..l.
And Profit could have been something more; the comments have been made that Siddig compromised the serious / comedy factors to the overall detriment – I personally think if they had channeled the humor more it might have stood up as an intentionally funny Trek episode… But that’s a hard bar to reach, and Tribbles are a hard standard to meet.
And while I think I’ll be in the minority here – especially as a non-ENT fan – I personally feel leaving out Archer’s speech was the one good call Voyages made… It leaves it open to the viewer – which not only creates a Maguffin on par with “what’s in the briefcase”, but spared us from B & B writing some hamfisted crap that Bakula couldn’t have redeemed no matter how hard he tried to chew through it.
All that said: series finales often weren’t that big a deal (with the exception of The Fugitive – war David Janssen) in the earlier days of TV – but there’s an expectation now that they wrap things up nicely as long as the staff knows the show’s ending. These Are the Voyages… tried to swing for the fences, and got caught at the plate windmilling all three pitches. That’s an epic fail even Quarkette can’t top.
So I reluctantly cast my vote for These Are the Voyages…