“Ow My Balls!” American Revolution edition
Ubisoft has released the official UK launch trailer for Assassin’s Creed III, which is coming to the PS3 and Xbox 360 next week then to PC next month. The new trailer follows Conner the half-English, half-Mohawk master assassin who changes the course of history during the American Revolution. There’s plenty of warfare, explosions, and tragic childhood flashbacks, as well as a bit of groin violence. All of that is set to “Radioactive” by Imagine Dragons, because every video game trailer is required to have wobble bass in it now.
The best part? Conner kicking a redcoat right in the jewels. The second best part? That this is the official UK trailer, yet they didn’t bother to tone down the “die redcoats die” vibe at all. As it should be. If you UK folks don’t like this trailer, you can all go back to France. THESE COLORS DON’T RUN, HOSS.
(H/T: PCGamer)
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The Brits are pretty good sports about that war, though they still sometimes refer to us as “The Colonies.”
It’s even more fitting because Hendo is part Native American! Also it is hilarious.
Awesome pic
Let’s skip the wub wub and go straight for Geto Boys. This would go well to Die Motherf***ers Die.
Everything needs more Geto Boys.
Mae’r rhan fwyaf o coch-gwisgo milwyr yn meibion mewnfudwyr budr, beth bynnag.
I can’t tell if you’re insulting the English and/or calling me a dirty immigrant.
His cat is getting better at using that keyboard, we should be seeing some full sentences soon.
To add insult to injury, the Brits get this game a day later than we do. AMERICUH FUCK YEA
And in other news, I’m posting today from the web browser on my xbox.
Weeeee!
Wow…we totally lucked out that the one Native American that apparently agrees with us on Manifest Destiny just happens to be an unstoppable assassin.
GODDAMMITSOMUCH I was f*ckin jazzed about this game. It was going to be totally awesome. NOW it’s RUINED because the WHOLE time this plucky indiginous bloke is kicking butt for the Americans I’ll just be thinking “Didn’t really do yourself any favors there, buddy.” It’s ridiculous. I’m not exactly the politically correct type but this is kind of wrong.
“As a token of our gratitude for your help in defeating the British and releasing the American Colonists from the yoke of oppression, we will take all of your land and wipe your civilization from existence.”
Assassins Creed 4: A German Jewish assassin must protect a resentful Wehrmacht Corporal when he is wounded and must be transferred from the front lines for medical treatment. Can the assassin keep Corporal Hitler alive through the journey?
The game’s final boss fight ends when Conner is handed a blanket.
You guys went in. ahahahahaha! Its absolutely outrageous but hey…..
You know, I think I read somewhere that he’s actually going to be fighting against both sides of the war somewhat.
“If you UK folks don’t like this trailer, you can all go back to France”.
Oh really?. The France that won the US Revolutionary War for you at the Chesapeake?. The whole thing would be a joke, if it wasn’t that the average US citizen thinks movies/game are historically correct.
The majority of the Native Americans fought for the Crown, because THEY tended to be honourable men who kept their oaths as they swore them, not traitors who broke their word and slaughtered their kin because it was expedient.
Sheesh.