So we should probably talk about Amazing Spider-Man #700.
Except it’s a waste of time, because this cash grab won’t stick. There will be spoilers past this point.
For those wondering, or those following the book but not able to get issue #700 due to the holiday, or just the fact that Marvel wants eight freaking bucks for the thing, Doc Ock’s brain in Peter’s body is now the permanent state of affairs. Really, the experience of reading this issue can be summed up in approximately eighteen seconds:
We could talk about how ending a seven-hundred issue run with a cheesy brain-switching plotline that just kind of peters out instead of ending in a satisfying way is a bit insulting to fans and previous creative teams. Or we could talk about a finale where Doc Ock decides to become a good guy because he sees Peter Parker’s life flash before his eyes is contrived and silly. Because it is contrived and silly. It’s essentially fanfic with gorgeous art. Thank you, Humberto Ramos, for taking this book seriously and putting in some of your best work.
But why bother?
This isn’t a permanent state of affairs. It will last approximately twelve issues, if that, because there’s no narrative gas here. Doc Ock in his most hated foe’s body with a gun to his head forcing him to be a good guy would be compelling. Doc Ock swinging around because somebody else feels guilty is not. And that’ll likely be reflected in the success, or lack thereof, of the Spidey books.
Peter’s personality is inevitably going to assert itself, once the sales numbers for the Superior Spider-Man aren’t exactly up to snuff. There will be a big fight in the center of Spidey’s mind, Ock will lose, and Peter will be free again.
Because this is what Marvel does with Spider-Man. They make an editorial decision to “shake things up”, and then a year or so later, they put everything relatively back to rights, and then somebody up top has a great idea that will change how we view Spider-Man… FOREVER. It really started with the black costume redesign from Secret Wars being incredibly unpopular, and has continued ever since.
So if Amazing Spider-Man #700 bothers you, just wait a year. Amazing Spider-Man #701 should be hitting the stands around then.
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So will Susan Lucci be playing Mary Jane now?
… Yes.
ted mcginley is the new spider man.
If I’m casting Spidey out of ‘The League’, Jon LaJoie all the way.
you’d cast taco as everyone, everywhere*
*i would also cast Taco as everyone.
They could do a Spider-Man movie in the style of Kung-Pow! Enter The Fist.
Better storyline I just made up:
Doc Ock has his mind fused with Mary Jane’s body. They fight over control of mind. Mary Janes body takes Doc Ock’s tentacles. Spiderman is still in love with Mary Jane and vice versa. 6 Handed Old Fashions ensue. BOOM!
I don’t know, Doc Ock handies seem a bit dangerous. Peter may be invulnerable, but the arms can cut skin with enough force behind them.
Spidey is now into S&M. Which explains the outfit.
I don’t know too many BDSM enthusiasts who list “flayed penis” as something they’re into, but to each their own I suppose. I guess there is somebody who wants to be touched in the no-no with a carrot peeler.
On another note, “Flayed Penis” would be an awesome name for a black metal band.
Dan you’re punching too many holes in my argument. I need you to agree with me. I offer you this as a bribe:
[i.imgur.com]
Bribe accepted. That is some IMPRESSIVE costume work! Where’d you find it?
Screen Rant, who found it from god knows where but I’m appreciative.
I vote for clone Saga two! The “original” Parker mysteriously comes back to bump off spiderpus in a last minute hail Mary by editors.
Then they will reveal that Ben Reilly is alive and was the real Peter Parker the whole time. Why not bring up Clone Saga while they are doing crap like this. We already have his brother Kaine running around so why the hell not.
Will the cover be a blood-spattered denim vest?
Well of course that’s the only thing that makes sense.
I thought the same thing would happen after OMD…Still waiting for it to revert back to what it was…
Come on. The articles I read yesterday said Spiderman (Doc Oc) defeats Doc Oc (actually Spiderman) because his body is dying and he has a yr to live. You telling me Peter wouldn’t exhaust every ounce of effort to heal Otto’s body so he can return to his own body? He DOES have friends in high places that can help like the F4.
Apparently nobody will believe him that he’s Peter Parker. Conveniently, the FF are off-planet and the Avengers apparently forgot every brain-switch plotline they ever went through for fifty years.
its gonna be weird when Spidey remembers that he almost married his Aunt May or however this works now.
Aunt May is married to J. Jonah Jameson’s dad. Seriously.
makes sense. i mean, there are only about four old people in New York. she can’t date Jarvis all the time.
i never got into “one more day” and i had hoped that the civil war spidey reveal would stick cuz it was such a big move…ive read nothing but good reviews regarding this arc here, but it doesnt make sense to me. id have a lot more respect for the story if marvel ever stuck by its guns..the marvel universe would be a lot more interesting if their major shifts werent recanted.
imagine dead Captain America, outlaw Iron Man, exposed Spiderman, dead Magneto/Prof X, etc
would be pretty interesting if u ask me…really hate when things that should change everything, change nothing at all
I know I’m supposed to just let this go, it’s not permanent, but GODDAMNIT I HATE IT. It seems so pointless.
It is pointless. But there’s more important things to be angry about.
Like nachos.
Oooooohhhhh…I love nachos. Thanks for giving me a great lunch idea!
Just don’t the Cheeze-Wiz covered kind. Those fill me with rage. Cheddar jack nachos fill me with joy. Also cholesterol.
Cheez Whiz is the worst. The Vienna Sausages of cheese. It’s like Doc Ock as Spider-man in your mouth.
There is a place near where I live that serves “Italian” nachos. Meat sauce and cheese on tortilla chips. If that’s not Doc Ock As Spider-Man in your mouth, I don’t know what is.
Dear sweet baby Jebus that sounds awful. They should put it on bruschetta chips. Oh, now I’m going to make that!
That I can get behind. BUT THEY ARE NOT NACHOS!
We’ve got a place near me that makes Sushi Nachos which are basically fried wonton chips with ahi tuna, seaweed, and some other stuff on them.
Feels so wrong, but tastes so right
I’m allergic to seafood, but I’d imagine those are delicious.
Irish Nachos are usually Waffle Fries with cheese and bacon on them. Now, don’t get me wrong, they are delicious. But there’s something racist about calling them “Irish Nachos.” I’m not sure how… I just feel like it’s racist.
After OMD and this, The Clone Saga is starting to look pretty good right about now…
Then you’ll love it when they reveal that aunt may is really a clone made by jackal
Also, Marvel will attempt a hostile crossover with “Clone” to try and smother a promising series in its cradle.
The shitty part 3 of the spidey trilogy, the shitty reboot, and now this. I’m pretty sure I’m done with him. Marvel will have to pick a different subject to ruin in order for me to care.
Actually, there are no screaming nightmares of fail currently on the horizon aside from this. Nothing flagship is godawful, although I must say the smaller books are much more interesting than the larger ones.
I’m sure it’s coming. The new direction of Thor is too interesting for them not to jack up.
dan, the flagship stuff is actually pretty solid–i’m surprised that I like a non-ultimate bendis written book again, but all new x-men isn’t too bad. captain america is a pretty great fourth world story but not a very good captain america one but still very good, aaron’s thor is INCREDIBLE, uncanny avengers is good, and hickman avengers is very good. the only non-flagship marvel books that i look forward to more than any of those are legacy and thunderbolts.
Yeah, “All-New” really surprised the hell out of me, “Thor” is a lot of fun, and “Legacy” is great. Indestructible Hulk is also easily one of my favorite books on the stands.
Disclaimer: I am not a Marvel reader, but I know the cliff notes version of Spider-Man’s history. That being said, when I read about the new change in Spider-Man, this was my reaction:
[www.youtube.com]
So I’m the only person in the world that LOVES this change. One More Day pissed the crap out of me and I’ve ignored Spidey’s existence since (unless Bachalo was drawing him). This won me back. What an exciting swerve that has a ton of new story potential! Too bad the internet can be so lonely sometimes.
In all sincerity: What do you like about it? I’d really like to know, understanding alternate perspectives makes me a better critic.
I’m not in the crowd that hates it completely. But I just don’t care. I think it could allow for some interesting stories, I just know that it won’t last long at all and Peter will return and things will go back to the status quo. There’s no way this isn’t reversed before Amazing Spider-Man 2 (or whatever it will be called) comes out.
I liked it too. For one thing, I’ve always been in the pro-Ramos camp, so the art was a big win for me, for another I’ve really enjoyed most (but not all) of the Slott stuff, and by and large the post OMD stuff, I’d lost interest before that and liked coming back to this. What was also neat was growing up, I thought Ock was Spidey’s biggest threat and never really got on board with the Osborne stuff, so it was fun to see Ock get his due. Finally, I know Peter will be back, like I knew the Human Torch would be back, but that’s probably my favorite FF story ever and while this isn’t my favorite, I like the developments and am interested to see where it goes. And I think Slott’s earned my patience.
TL DR: It wasn’t perfect, but it was good, and more importantly it was just interesting and makes me quite anxious to read more.
I definitely agree about the art. I may not like the story, but Ramos did a superb job.
Maybe I’m just spurned that Peter Parker traded his marriage away for the life of his 70 year old aunt – and seeing him get crossed like that by his worst enemy felt satisfying. But in all honesty, as a fan of heels, it’s fun to see a what-if story stick. Watching a always beaten villain take the shoes of his enemy creates a lot more interesting scenarios and organic problems than the forced ones that writers have been making Parker endure for the last several years. I mean, how many ‘Peter-down-on-his-luck’ stories can people come up with. Even by reading a random issue, you can see how routine fighting villains have become to him. Now we have a new perspective on all of the typical problems Peter has faced, and a fresh perspective. Even if this is temporary, it’s still fascinating and the potential for stories are endless. I mean, just think – what would it be like if a serial-life-villain suddenly got thrust into the Avengers line-up without them knowing? What would life be like if you had a second chance at EVERYTHING? So many possibilities. I’m hooked!
One More Day was a bad story. It seemed to me that Marvel wanted to end Peter’s marriage because telling stories about a single Spider-Man is more interesting. And, it was to be fair. Brand New Day forward has been, for the most part, great. There were a few bumps along the way, but it was mostly a success in my opinion. Superior Spider-Man on the other hand is just another chapter int he post BND world. It’s a new title, it’s starting over at #1 and it technically stars a new character, but Peter will be back. There is absolutely no doubt in my mind about that. Of course.. the boring extra story that comes after the main story in 700 was interesting… maybe Peter Parker’s body will bounce around the marvel universe for a little while, with different people taking it over and being Spider-Man for a bit?
Heh, like Captain Universe, but with more guilt.
Between Marvel and DC lately things are looking good that I might actually be able to afford a new tv soon.
Both are putting out some damn good books, in their defense. It’s just that this is NOT one of Marvel’s.
Who needs a tv when you could be reading Hawkguy?
That is a valid point.
disclaimer: not a spiderman question. Can someone explain to me why Rafi is getting butt ploughed in the back seat of that car. disclosure: I like the league missed season 1.
…It’s best left to discover for yourself. It comes up in Season Three.
I have yet to read the issue yet, but I will say this. Dan Slott has been killing it on Amazing for the last couple years now. It’s one of my favorite books and whenever I hear some hipster saying “superhero comics are lame”, or some variation, I always want to shake them and scream about how great Amazing is.
Obviously this isn’t permanent but who cares, The issues where it was first revealed that Doc Ock has switched placed with Peter left my jaw on the floor. Unlike other “editorial mandated” stories like OMD or the Clone Saga I’m excited to see where this story leads.
I think this would’ve made a great or at least interesting story for a few issues, but turning it into its own series is just setting it up for failure.
Dan Slott said in an interview on Comic Vine that this is in no way going to last forever, because nothing in comics does. The creative team understands that, accepts that and in my opinion has incorporated it into the upcoming plot. At this point, I’m more interested in what will happen once Doc Ock starts interacting with Spider-Mans pals. How long will it take for Iron Man or Captain America to realize something’s up with Peter. MJ will figure it out first, if she hasn’t already. What about Harry or Norman Osborn? The Green Goblin will probably figure it out quickly, and how pissed is he going to be to find out it’s Octavious wearing Peter’s skin and not Peter himself?
Will it last forever? Certainly not. Will it be an entertaining story about my favorite super villain taking over my favorite super hero’s body? That’s up to Dan Slott.