
Escape From New York — like most John Carpenter movies from the 80s (hell, like most 80s movies period) it’s super goofy, but dammit, for whatever reason the movie’s still a lot of fun. It would never work today, but that’s not going keep Joel Silver and Studio Canal from embarking on a doomed attempt to remake the film!
In fact the plan is to transform Escape From New York into a trilogy (the first movie will be a Rise of the Planet of the Apes-esque prequel). Yup, they’re going to stretch a movie with a plot that can be summed up in half a sentence — “Kurt Russell and his eyepatch save the President from New York” — into three movies.
You know what? I’m rooting for these Escape From New York remakes — if they succeed they’ll really pave the way for my planned They Live quadrilogy.




This is why we can’t have nice things.
Call me Snake…
They’ll need boobs to rival Adrienne Barbeau, a chief henchman to equal Lee Van Cleef, and an absolute promise that at the end of the trilogy Snake will, once again, kill the entirety of human civilisation because he’s annoyed at the way it’s going. And then it might be worth watching.
(Seriously, Escape From LA is bad in many ways, but Kurt Russell’s delivery of “Welcome to the human race” redeems it)
Looks like Kate Upton will get to be in another movie
My vote is for Annie’s Boobs (the actual boobs, not the monkey).
Insert obligatory, “Plissken, I heard you were dead.”
Why a They Live quadrilogy and not a trilogy one might ask?
Because one of those movies will just be one giant fight scene.
I have come here to chew bubblegum and cash in on 80′s action movie nostalgia with likely disastrous results. And I’m all out of bubblegum.
I’d pay 100 dollars to watch Roddy Piper and Keith David fight for 90 minutes.
Especially 2013 Piper and Keith David. That will be even more entertaining.
Actually the fight scene takes up two of the movies.
I did not care for Escape from L.A. It insists upon itself.
If they got the casting right and kept the wonderful nudity of the 80s intact, I’d be down for a Road House remake. Who could best pull off Dalton…know what, Ryan Gosling could probably kill that. Or Timothy Olyphant. Put them both in and make. it. ROCK.
No. The answer is no. Nobody wants this.
Teh Staf?
Will the prequel take place on Shadow Moses? Cos I’m fine with that…
Whatever, man. Elementary school me thought Escape From L.A. was Oscar worthy.
If they don’t include some back story on his escape from Cleveland than this is all for nothing…
The latest Devil May Cry game actually did a sort of updated “They Live” plot, but with more faux-hipster demons.
So the first one is a prequel and the second will be Escape from New York then the third film will be Escape from LA? Also I hope they bring back Stacey Keech.
I was totally expecting you to be the first to reply to this story. A profile pic is a sacred trust man!
It will never happen again.
Yeah man, I was all over that “midget eaten by a badger” story. Shit I’m just glad the With Leather guys aren’t Wisconsin fans.
Borgnine will be missed. As will Buscemi for #2.