NY Times Compares Taylor Lautner’s Face To That Of A Neanderthal

Okay, it’s one thing for bloggy blogs like Filmdrunk to hilariously and accurately compare Taylor Lautner’s face to a llama’s, but it’s another when the New York Times is dissing his looks in their review of Abduction, which I will not see, EVER, just as I will never see any movie in which Taylor Lautner is cast as the lead actor.

To give Mr. Lautner his due, he is a martial-arts dervish with perfectly sculptured abs. His acting, however, is another matter. I can’t recall another teenage star so opaque. If his physiognomy—recessed eyes that don’t seem to focus, a wide snub nose and Elvis-y lips—conjure Neanderthal manhood after a cosmetic makeover, his boyish monotone with its utter lack of inflection suggests that he is really an advanced robot simulating human speech without registering emotion or even comprehension.

That has to be the most vicious underhanded slam of a “movie star” I’ve ever read in an old media publication. At the very least, once his career goes belly up he can still get commercial work from Geico.

(HT: Low Industrial)