Stephen Colbert Declares Phallic War On Anderson Cooper

After Anderson Cooper jokingly took Colbert to task recently for “stealing” a story he did weeks ago about a Denver area man who sees hidden penises in the artwork at the Denver Airport, Colbert fired back with a hilarious rant at Cooper, whose homosexuality is sort of an open secret at this point.

“It was foolish of me to believe that even on my best day, I could beat Anderson Cooper to a phallus party,” Colbert said. “I am sorry.”

The rant climaxes, if you will, with Colbert goes all Perez Hilton and draw penises all over Cooper’s face on a monitor. I found it very enjoyable.