Best: Personalized Referee Uniforms
I think it’s nice that special guest referees get to change up the zebra stripes. Whether it’s HBK’s sleeveless or AJ’s half shirt, you can tell a lot about a person by the way they alter their uniforms. My first summer job was at Beverly Country Club in Chicago and I made sure to alter my clothes to appear more like a Medieval peasant. Sure it was hot as hell in those britches, but it gave the golfers the sense of superiority that made them more like to throw some extra dollars my way — and spit on me. I just wonder what Earl Hebner would have done to his…
This needs to stop now. Not only will it mean we’ll get even more social media talk besides _____ is trending on Twitter, but it also means we’ll get moment like last night where Cole tells us that someone’s favorite RAW memory was AJ proposing to Punk. Now I don’t know anything about this girl personally, but I’m sure she’s a bad person.
Best: CM Punk vs Bryan
And as what should come as the least surprising event of the evening, CM Punk vs Daniel Bryan was a great wrestling match. This still happened despite the best efforts to sabotage it with an unnecessary stipulation, much less ones created via text message. Think Hornswaggle is the anonymous WWE texter?
When you have great wrestlers, you don’t need gimmicks (unless they decide to bring back the triple cage). This match had it all. Daniel Bryan busted out a sweet huricanrana GTS counter and the surfboard submission. Punk had his innovative chair scoop slam and beat Bryan with a ken-do stick (aka Singapore Cane) like he stole something from him. The only thing that would have made it better was if he told Bryan to, “Go cut me a switch,” beforehand.
Luckily for us this feud doesn’t appear to be slowing down. While some may criticize the WWE for having the same guys wrestle each other week after week, I could get used to seeing Bryan vs Punk every Monday night. It’ll be nice to see Bryan get some momentum going. Last night was he became the first wrestler in WWE history to lose five PPV matches in a row with major titles on the line. He’s still the people’s champ, however, which means absolutely nothing.
Worst, Then Best: AJ as Guest Referee
I knew AJ was going to get knocked down in the match and then come back, but it still frustrated me. Despite being someone’s 95 lb girlfriend she’s still a wrestler and shouldn’t have to go in the back because she gets bumped off the apron. The only thing worse than the event was Booker T’s response. “That would never happen to an experienced referee!” Really? WWE referees drop easier than those fainting goats and only about half as adorable.
Needless to say, she wasn’t a huge factor and that was appreciated. I’m still not sure where they’re going with the story, but it was nice to finally see some subtle (for wrestling) advancement. After the match, Punk barely paid attention to her and simply gave her a sideways glance towards the end. As long as we don’t find out on RAW that AJ and Eve are in cahoots and create Team Hoeski, I’ll be content.
Best: Ryback’s advancement
Now maybe I was still drunk from my bachelor party this weekend, but I even like the handicap match. Ryback didn’t totally squash Reks and Hawkins like he did all the other jobbers he’s faced and the King even threw in a Superman reference. Not sure what I dislike more, though. The fact that his finisher is now called Shellshocked or the whole marching thing before he actually does it.
Best: Jericho’s Hair On His First Raw Episode
You know it
Best: A Divas Match?
Now I know I’m still drunk. At first I thought the only positive thing I’d say about the match was Layla’s bedazzled knee brace, but the match turned out nicely. It’s amazing what can happen when you actually let your talent wrestle on a pay per view without Maria Menounos. I wonder how they’ll set them back tonight. Maybe the Godwins return on RAW and Beth Phoenix get thrown into a pig pen match.
Best: Everything But The Result
Now before we get to how much we hate the ending, let’s just recognize that the match itself was entertaining. The Miz showed himself to be Bizarro-Samson; cutting his hair appears to make him stronger. Concerning his previous performances, I was skeptical about what he would contribute to the match. At the very least, I figured he could make up for the lack of wrestling by taking big bumps. You know, like Mick Foley just without knees of 125 year old man.
Both Kane and Big Show continued their stretch of solid performances. Kane nonchalantly knocking Miz off by throwing a ladder at him was my personal favorite and Big show got to take an extended nap under a pile of ladders. Show’s custom ladder made another appearance and the announcers pretended that they had never seen it before. Continuity issues were the least of concerns, though. Which brings us to …
I want more like this!
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