When news broke yesterday that the Golden State Warriors would be wearing special alternate jerseys that featured actual, honest-to-God sleeves, my first thought was, “Oh crap, Darren Rovell is going to be even more insufferable than usual.” You see, Rovell – who I will from this moment on refer to as Sh*t Biscuit – raised an argument a while back about how NBA teams should make a sleeved jersey because fans (read: white people) really shouldn’t wear NBA jerseys.
The problem with this argument was that while I agreed with that part about morons who wear NBA jerseys with nothing under them looking like shmucks, you can’t just go changing an entire league’s uniforms. And the problem with those new Warriors jerseys is… that I kind of like them. However, in the case of Sh*t Biscuit’s argument that fans could wear them, it’s still a no. Nobody wants to see Glenn Davis wearing a skin tight shirt, so nobody wants to see my fat ass in one either.
In conclusion, if you want something with sleeves that shows support for your NBA team, buy a t-shirt.
NBA: Portland at Miami – 7:30 PM ET on NBA TV
Reason No. 14278648 why NBA players shouldn’t wear sleeves is because I like playing my favorite game – “Who Has the Stupidest Tattoo?” Giving the Birdman or Deshawn Stevenson sleeves is simply no fun. Might as well make them wear turtlenecks.
NBA: Houston at Golden State – 10:30 PM ET on NBA TV
Good lord, it’s games like this that make me happy that U-Verse doesn’t have the NBA Network available for free.
NCAA Basketball: Kentucky at Florida – 7 PM ET on ESPN
NCAA Basketball: Virginia Tech at Virginia – 7 PM ET on ESPN U
NCAA Basketball: Seton Hall at Rutgers – 7 PM ET on ESPN 2
NCAA Basketball: Alabama at Georgia – 9 PM ET on ESPN U
NCAA Basketball: Michigan at Michigan State – 9 PM ET on ESPN
If these fantastic rivalry games aren’t enough for you, ESPN Classic is also airing some of the most memorable Duke-UNC games of the past 20 years, leading up to tomorrow night’s matchup between No. 4 Duke and the irrelevant Tar Heels. But if you do watch old Duke-UNC games, you have to drink with your pinkie out while wearing a tuxedo.
I want more like this!
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