A High School Basketball Team In Pennsylvania Has Four Sets Of Twins

High school basketball coach Buddy Valinsky might have one of the hardest jobs in the country. Not only does he have to help mold the young men that make up his varsity basketball team at Taylor Allderdice High School in Pittsburgh and lead them to victory, but he also has to be able to tell three sets of twins apart. That’s right, Valinsky’s Allderdice Dragons roster is comprised of, among other more boring players, three sets of paternal twins and one set of fraternal twins. I assume the fraternal pair is there so he can shout at the others, “Why can’t you be more like them?!?!”

In a recent interview with WTAE News, the coach admitted that it’s really tough to tell the twins apart when he’s trying to chew their heads off or congratulate them, but the players have really taken to the local excitement involving their “Twinsanity.”

First of all, that was some amazing split-screen technology in the intro right there, local reporter guy. As for Javaughn and Davaughn, Jimmy and Timmy, Kenny and Keith, and the other two that don’t look alike, I’m going to once again offer to write their story for a Disney sports movie pro bono, because the idea is just ripe for HILARIOUS hijinks.

Think about it – they could be the stars of their high school team, but just because they’re the same on the outside doesn’t mean they’re the same right… *taps heart* here. In fact, while Jimmy loves hoops and is the star of the varsity squad, Timmy loves books and aspires to be a poet, even though that’s not a real job. Meanwhile, their adoptive father (played by Nick Nolte) needs a liver transplant to live (play from your personal experiences, Nick) so the brothers have to enter a local tournament that will just so happen to pay them the exact amount of money they need to save their dad. The only problem? If they play, they’ll lose their scholarships to State College University, which was the dream that “Pops” had for them. What choice will they make and will a wealthy old businessman be inspired by their story and offer to send them to the colleges of their choice once they’ve saved their father by winning the tournament and also the hearts of their paternal twin girlfriends? That’ll be up to Disney to decide. Clock’s ticking.

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