Ever since news broke about the so-called "South Beach Cannibal" eating off a man's face hit the internet, the internet has predictably responded by toeing the line between good and bad taste in its efforts to make light of one of the more horrendous news stories of the 21st century.

Okay here's the thing: I've done everything in my power to avoid the so-called "South Beach cannibal" story -- the tragic tale of the homeless guy who had his face eaten off by another homeless guy who was hopped up on bath salts in Miami.