A performance fartist using the pseudonym “Mr. Methane” didn’t fare well on “Britain’s Got Talent,” where his musical flatulence was too avant-garde for the Philistines in the audience and the judges’ chairs to understand. Yes, your eyes and ears do not deceive you: this REALLY IS a 42-year-old man in a mask and cape farting into a microphone along to Strauss’s “Blue Danube Waltz.”
I can’t help but be humbled by Mr. Methane. You see, everything I write on this blog is essentially just farting into a microphone, but I get to do it in the privacy of my own home. Usually in my underwear. He does it in front of a disgusted audience and handles their scorn like it’s a friendly wave. That takes titanium balls. Kudos to you, sir. This fart noise is for you.
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What you do is painfully obvious to everyone but yourself.
What you do is painfully obvious to everyone but yourself.
What does this comment even mean? Is it disagreement with my assessment that I’m farting into a microphone? Please, enlighten me on how I’m not self-aware.
Well there goes my productivity for the day. Ah well. *tucks napkin into shirt collar* Think i’ll start with the Smoothy.
And now, a man with a tape recorder in his nose.
I assume this is the same Mr. Methane that used to be on the Stern Show all the time. Truly one of the great artists of our time.