How I Met Your Mother (CBS) — I think it was last week’s episode (UPDATE: or tonight’s, I dunno) that featured cat bridesmaids and Alyson Hannigan as a stripper. Thumbs up to that. In tonight’s episode, half of the episode drags along while Ted gets a story line. Then Barney says something awesome, and you feel justified for watching.
Lie to Me (Fox) — Season premiere. This is probably different from “The Mentalist” in some way, but I doubt I’ll ever bother to find out how.
Trauma (NBC) — Series premiere. Doo de doo, nothing to see here, just your typical medical drama… ON SPEED!!! Car wrecks! Helicopter crashes! Explosions and crap! First-response paramedics skateboard and drink Monster!
House (Fox) — Did you hear that the Lucy who inspired “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” just died of lupus? Dude, House and his team of doctors would have been all over that. That episode of “House” would have been over in 12 minutes.
Castle (ABC) — I think somebody actually got upset when I didn’t mention the season premiere of this. Whatever, pal.
Popzilla (MTV) — The writer for this show actually emailed me and asked me to watch the premiere (it’s on at 6:30 Eastern). He’s one of the first industry people to acknowledge that I exist. In other words, his career is pretty much over. Read a review here.
Dirty Money: The Business of High End Prostitution (CNBC) — Yahoo: “A look inside the world of escorts who service the rich and powerful.” I’d rather have a look inside the escorts. And by “look” I mean “penis.”