For those of you who didn’t see the return of Renee (Annie Wersching) on last night’s “24″ and are worried about spoilers, I can tell you this much: this guy’s hand does NOT get sawed off. But what happens next is pretty awesome, so if you don’t want it spoiled, stop reading now.
Okay, did we get rid of the bitches who whine about spoilers? All right, good.
So anyway, Jack (Kiefer Sutherland) is worried that Renee is too unstable to go undercover and reconnect with the Russian mob, and she proves that she’s totally sane by seducing her parole-braceleted mob contact into putting his wrist into a vise and then SLICING OFF HIS THUMB WITH A POWER SAW.
It’s my favorite TV blood splatter since “Mad Men’s” lawnmower incident.
And can I say that I’m immensely turned on by Renee? I’m probably going to stay tuned to this season of “24″ just because of her. She’s like Kate from “Lost,” but crazier and with a bigger rack. And those two traits are the hottest things a woman can have. Mental instability and big tits. I think I’m in love.
(video via Inside TV)
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“did we get rid of the bitches who wine about spoilers?”
Don’t forget about the bitches that whine about spoilers.
Them too
You didn’t even tell them about the corkscrew in the dickhole!
…
SPOILER ALERT!
At first I was all, you know, her rack isn’t that big. And then I looked at the fourth picture, and I was like, hey, you know what, her rack is pretty big after all.
I would love to give her more freckles…made out of semen!
/MY parole bracelet is on my ankle and I find it more stylish that way
Note to Uff, not to leave her off of next year’s Top 10 List of most do-able TV Babes. She was slighted in 2009, because 24 premieres so early in the year.
The only thing I really enjoyed about the 4 Hour “Premiere” was the paradigm shift of her character being the crazy one “doing what it takes” and Jack Bauer being the one trying to reel her in. C’mon Jack, time to nut up again.
I stopped watching this show a few years ago. What did I miss? Let me guess: CTU was compromised, Jack tortured some people, and by breaking the rules, saved the day at the last hour?
Someone needs to figure out for me why mental instability is so goddamn sexy. Last season I was all “ohhh I like this Renee character, she’s cute.” Last night? “HOLY FUCK I’D CHOP MY ARM OFF TO SEX HER”
And to all people why whine about 24′s formulaic plot– get fucked. Seriously. Yes, I realize essentially the same thing happens ever year. But you know what also happens every year? Jack kicks tons of ass. He hits people in the chest with axes and tosses henchmen down 8 flights of stairs. Hot crazy chicks seduce members of the Russian mob and saw off their extremities. If this doesn’t sound entertaining to you, I’m sure there’s a “True Life: I’m a Fatty” on MTV ready and waiting for your consumption.
Mental instability and big tits. And red hair. Never forget red hair.
I’d like to spoil this alert bitch with some wine.
Red hair begets craziness – Beware the Ginger!
I need to beget up in that.
That’s an angle grinder matt…
Tim Was Tim is the winner of this message board. That is all.
Hey John!!!