Ordinarily, I work in silence. I don’t like the distraction of TV or music when I’m trying write. However, my TV is on and blasting right now, and it will stay that way for the next month, because THE MUTHA-EFFIN’ WORLD CUP IS ON. I absolutely love the World Cup. As I type, it’s pregame for South Africa versus Mexico, and I’m immeasurably excited to spew venom at the Tricolores for the next 90 minutes.
Anyway, I don’t want to get too much sports in your TV coverage, but you can check With Leather for my World Cup preview and daily World Cup updates over the next month. In the meantime, you can expect me to half-ass work here at Warming Glow if there’s a really good match on ESPN. That’s just facts, and I’m not sorry.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/226/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/04/David-Ortiz-4-150x138.gif)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/03/A0RG7LgCQAAWTik-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/12/sandyhook-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/12/landscape05-Mount-Reinebringen-Norway-150x150.jpg)
I think Matt Damon will play well this morning.
So nice to hear someone else looking excited about this.
I agree… I was afraid I was going to get mocked because I have freaking goose bumps.
That’s just facts, and I’m not sorry.
“That’s just facts”? I can see the half-assing has hit the ground running.
You could cut diamonds with my nipples.
No, really, come try.
you can expect me to half-ass work here at Warming Glow if there’s a really good match on ESPN
Because of your blog(s) and the rest of the Uproxx family, I always half-ass work, so we’re good.
Yawn.
I’ve already started robbing and kidnapping tourists to express my support of the South African side.
It’s times like this I really wish I worked from home. Luckily, I’m off today and get to hear how dedicated South African is to horn blowing. It’s quite impressive.
Controversia!
@ Red
how dedicated South African is to horn blowing.
*immediately books ticket to Johannesburg, unzips pants upon arrival*
*notices no one in rush to provide oral sex, hears faint noise of actual horns being blown at soccer stadium*
*both heads hang limply in disappointment*
I am bitterly disappointed that WG didn’t get it’s own photoshop for this article, instead of just ripping off the one from WL. Half-assed, for sure.
I’m with on the Tricolores, though. Is it wrong to hope a plane crashes into the stadium and takes that half out?
I’d normally be outraged at that blown offsides call, but … it’s the Messicans.
Oh God, you, too? Why must you all act like this homo sport matters? When does the NFL start?
It wasn’t a blown offsides call
Is there such a thing as a really good soccer match? Every time I see it on tv it’s either 0-0 or 1-0. But I’m sure that one goal was the greatest thing anyone has ever seen. What a boring ass sport
I am bitterly disappointed that WG didn’t get it’s own photoshop for this article, instead of just ripping off the one from WL. Half-assed, for sure.
Well, considering *I* made the Photoshop, I figured it’d be okay. Dick.
Yeah, I stand corrected on the call. Stupid half-ass attempt to do work and watch at the same time.
I guess Clint isn’t a hockey fan, where the scores are similar, or a baseball fan, where a game in which no one scores or even gets a hit is considered the greatest thing ever!
I’m sorry you’re too stupid to follow the game. Thanks for coming here to make sad trombone noises for those of us who can.
Otto, at least hockey is fast and there is constant action. I don’t like baseball though. I get why people like soccer, I just personally do not find it exciting. Sorry to get your panties in a bunch.
GOAL!!!!!!!!
Soccer isn’t fast? Seriously?
Sorry to be snippy, but I’ve never understood the need of some people to pipe up in a thread about something they don’t like just to say that they don’t like it.
You sound like my mother-in-law piping up during the Hangover: “You think this is funny? This isn’t funny.”
So glad I work at a university – free ESPN3!!!
Sitting at my desk in my US jersey can’t wait for tomorrow!
If you watch the WC coverage on The Daily Show, that is me hitting John Oliver in the head with a streamer (kind of an accident) when he was at the game in Hartford!
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Mexico.
I heard Arizona wasn’t airing the world cup as a strategy to deter immigrants from wanting to go there. BTW Why all of a sudden is ESPN trying so hard to get people into soccer? Soccer is on par with the WNBA here. Soccer turns gay as soon as you are old enough to play football.
Are you fucking kidding me? How did that not go in?!
Anyone who is a baseball fan and says soccer is boring can lick my balls. OH, and fuck Mexico!
When does Mexico play Portugal? I need to know when I can make the “greatest country in the world” reference.
I had to take the kids to the zoo today and forgot that the World Cup started at half two over here.
clean cut Alexei Lalas be crazy
“Well, considering *I* made the Photoshop, I figured it’d be okay. Dick.”
Wow. Really?
1-1 tie and a 0-0 tie. Riveting stuff I tell ya. If this is the most popular sport in the rest of the world, then the rest of the world is lame as shit.
Finally, I get to see all of my favorite soccer stars! Like Ariaga! Ariaga II! Bariaga! Aruglia! and Pizzoza!
I think Matt Damon will play well this morning.
THISISOURDESTINY!!!!
@TheDude: When people in America wonder why the rest of the world looks at them with suspicion, comments like yours is usually a prime example.
‘This was boring! In the NBA we have scores every 24 seconds! We rule! I fell asleep watching soccer, never do that in our sports!’
My condolences on your ADHD, Dude. Have fun watching the Super Sparkle Shiny Object Show known as the NBA.
I wish a scientist would give me 4 more hands so I can give the World Cup an appropriate amount of wanking motions it properly deserves. Instead of counting goals, it should be scored by which team has the most elaborate fake injury acts.
Ah, yes, the NBA. Where the amounts of jerseys you have sold with your name on it is directionly proportional to how many steps you get to travel with out being called. Where the only action is the last 2 minutes of the game, and fouling is a strategy. How f*cking gay is that?
Instead of counting goals, it should be scored by which team has the most elaborate fake injury acts.
Funny, I read this comment after watching tiny little Ron Artest pretend to be hurled away by the awesome might of Rajon Rondo.
Is there some D-list stand-up routine from the late ’80s that all the soccer trolls steal material from? “A 1-1 tie? Booooring!” “Hey, what’s up with all these fake injuries?” “And why are there dots on the ball?”