This is a screencap from the results page of Oprah Winfrey’s “Your Own Show” contest for her OWN Network. You might be saying, “Hey, what about that Zach Anner fellow? You know, the charismatic wheelchair guy with cerebral palsy? Didn’t he have a lot of votes?” And the answer is yes. Yes, he did have a lot of votes. And even though Oprah and her cronies already went through one round of tampering with the online voting to work against Anner, they apparently decided, “Hey, that wasn’t quite enough. Let’s just take six million votes away from the leading candidate.” Even South American dictators are all, “Whoa, that’s pretty egregious.”
Anyway, Anner finished seventh in the obviously rigged voting and still has a chance to be a contestant on an OWN show to get his own show (wait, what?), but he’s already destined for bigger things: Reddit has started a campaign to make Anner “The Daily Show’s” Senior Travel Correspondent. Man, I hope that works out. I don’t want Zach anywhere near Oprah’s handicapped-hating clutches. She’s basically a Bond villain at this point. I’m shocked she doesn’t host her show while petting a cat. Which, coincidentally, would make her fans love her even more.