The Walking Dead (AMC, Sunday) – The much-anticipated series premiere… on Halloween night. OO-ooo-OO. Spooky. I’ll watch it alone though, because I’m a big strong man, who’s not afrai–ZOMG WHAT’S THAT SOUND?! (*shrieks, uses cat as shield*).
CSI: Miami (CBS, Sunday) – From TVGuide.com, “Natalia goes undercover when a man claims to have dreamed about a murder before it happened…” Said Horatio, “Natalia, when you’re done I need you to figure out who stole our missing multicultural hiring results. I call it the case of the… (*sunglasses*)… ripped off Minority Report.”
Boardwalk Empire (HBO, Sunday) – I’m two full episodes behind on this show, and not happy about it. Well, not two full episodes behind. I have seen the nude scenes, naturally. Don’t worry, I’ll punish myself later (click image to animate.)
The Soup (E!, Friday) – Has anyone else noticed that Joel McHale’s hair is spiked off to the right (the viewer’s left), and he always leans his head that way? My two-part working theory is that his hair is exceptionally heavy and that I need to go back on the OCD meds.
Holmes on Homes (HGTV, Sunday) – This show badly needs a Mexican sidekick, if for no other reason than to have him say, “Holmes on homes, holmes.” Also, cheap labor.
Red: Werewolf Hunter (SyFy, Friday) – Wait. Just a werewolf? Come on SyFy, you can do better than that. How about “Werewolftopus,” or “Weregator,” or “Sharktobearopuswolf.” At least tell me there will be crappy CGI. I don’t want to live in a world where your movies don’t feature unnecessarily dangerous animal hybrids OR cut-rate special effects.
I want more like this!
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