Betty White Is Ready to Party

Damn, Betty White. You just got me aroused. I’ll add you to the list for when I finish my time machine. [Lily Mars]

How to wake up during winter. Natural light alarm clocks. Perfect for anyone who can’t afford to spend their winter at a Mexican resort. [UPROXX]

Books? Ugh. Don’t worry, there are pictures! A list of reading material for any geeks you may know — including the awesome-looking Nextwave, which is ”like Shakespeare but with lots more punching.” [UPROXX]

This is why he’s incredible. Here’s a GIF of the Incredible Hulk throwing a bear. Why? BECAUSE HE CAN. [Robot in Disguise]

The Cowboys are the new Knicks. Not necessarily the worst team in the league, but certainly the most glorious disaster. [With Leather]

Hey, what’s Uwe Boll been up to? Oh, not much: just making Blubberella,”superhero comedy about an overweight half-vampire who fights Nazis.” Although that description makes it sound better than it looks. [FilmDrunk]

The Little Debbie Diet. You can eat all the junk food you want and still lose weight, as long as you’re cutting back on calories. Thanks, science! [Gamma Squad]

Oh, hey! TV news and notes:

Comedy is not quantifiable. The chart at left from SplitSider has been making the rounds the last couple days (click to enlarge), and while I agree that “30 Rock” is funnier than “Bleep My Dad Says,” the methodology unfairly turns art into science. “Weeds” writer Stephen Falk wrote an excellent response to it. [Stephen Falk]

Cheater: ‘I didn’t cheat.’ Caitlin Burke, the woman who solved a Wheel of Fortune puzzle with only one letter, rejects claims that she cheated. Actually, the way she describes it, she makes it sound believable (Call me, Caitlin!) [Fox411]

THEO! Malcolm-Jamal Warner will play Shirley’s ex-husbanc on “Community.” [EW]

‘I’m happy I cut my legs off.’ But how will she wear her Bad Idea Jeans now? [The Clearly Dope]