Let’s Spend the Night Together: Confessions of Rock’s Greatest Groupies (VH1) — Part of VH1′s series of “Rock Docs,” this will be hosted by Pamela Des Barres, who hooked up with Jim Morrison, Mick Jagger, Jimmy Page, Keith Moon, Frank Zappa, and many more. She must’ve been, like, the Pele of anal.
Hell’s Kitchen (Fox) — Season 8 finale. The final battle to determine the best chef who couldn’t get cast on “Top Chef.” (Note: “Top Chef” is also on tonight. Watch that instead.)
Psych (USA) — One of the characters does that thing where he sees the world if he had never been born. Yeah, we get it: It’s a Wonderful Life is a good movie. No need to beat this well-worn holiday trope into the ground any more.
My Skin Is Killing Me (TLC) — Just a reminder: TLC still exists.
The Sing-Off (NBC) — Guhhh, this show is doing better and better in the ratings. This is why we can’t have nice things, America. While we’re on the subject of a capella singing, here’s Liberty University’s group performing a Christmas carol-ified version of “Bed Intruder” (below).
What’s more surprising: that there’s a mohawked lesbian at Jerry Falwell’s college, or that there’s a black dude? You think the black guy has to use a separate water fountain? Or is he there on scholarship as a full-time publicity photo model for the admissions department?