Han Solo Was in 'Firefly' (Kind Of)
Christina Hendricks in Playboy...

Helpful Anal Massage Tips from a Guy with a Mustache

Written by Matt Ufford / 01.13.11

This isn’t exactly TV-related, but it absolutely must be shared. This is Joseph Kramer in the 1998 video Uranus: Self Anal Massage for Men. Yes,

If you do one hundred anal breaths a day, you will start to let go of anal tension.

I’m no ass doctor, but isn’t a little bit of anal tension a good thing? I mean, without it, there’d be poo everywhere.

Also, I have no idea what an “anal breath” is, but your mom sure had it last night.

[via BuzzFeed]

TAGS:
Pin It
submit to reddit
Share on Tumblr

[avatar]
Profile
16 comments
Matt Ufford posted

"Helpful Anal Massage Tips from a Guy with a Mustache"

  1. 01.13.11 at 2:38 pm
    ILovePaleHoseandPaleHos

    I’m pretty sure that guy was on “The 700 Club”, too.

    If he wasn’t, he should have been.

  2. 01.13.11 at 2:43 pm
    Upstate Underdog

    Hoo boy……

  3. 01.13.11 at 2:54 pm
    LastTexansFan

    Dad?!?

  4. 01.13.11 at 2:56 pm
    Enrico Pallazzo

    Joseph Kramer would like to ass you a few questions.

  5. 01.13.11 at 3:00 pm
    Sensei John Kreese

    Is that Flanders?

  6. 01.13.11 at 3:16 pm
    Otto Man

    Is that Flanders?

    That Simpsons porn parody is even more disturbing than we thought.

  7. 01.13.11 at 3:34 pm
    Zack

    If you practice your anal breaths every day, before you know if you’ll be inhaling those ass pennies right up.

  8. 01.13.11 at 3:35 pm
    Zack

    …before you know IT…

    /I hate seeing mistakes at the exact moment I press the “Post Comment” button.

  9. 01.13.11 at 3:47 pm
    guitarjustin

    This is awesome. You think each sentence is the most uncomfortable thing you have ever heard. Then comes the next sentence and eventually spirals into a vortex of NAMBLA, Old English, and Astroglide.

  10. 01.13.11 at 3:48 pm
    Dustinr

    Anyone else think “the young man from Nantucket” is the worst erotic-related nickname of all time?

  11. 01.13.11 at 4:03 pm
    guitarjustin

    That would make more sense if I said English Leather. AAAAH!

  12. 01.13.11 at 4:24 pm
    CrabApple

    Everyone knows true anal yoga and this isn’t it. It is a slap in the anus to people who have studied this art for years.

  13. 01.13.11 at 6:05 pm
    Dick Flinstone

    Until now, I was always told The Male Queef was a myth.

  14. 01.13.11 at 10:04 pm
    Fetushead Shame Closet

    Pretty sure that guy’s anal breath smells like ass burgers

  15. 01.13.11 at 11:14 pm
    Brian Gilmore

    So who else wants to see what Al’s up to?

  16. 01.14.11 at 7:40 am
    LaFavre

    There is no statute of limitation on this sort of crime.

Sign Up

Follow Us