WAAAAANNNNTTTT.

HO. LEE. CRAP.

So the “Rockumentary” episode of “Saved by the Bell” was on TBS the other morning. As I was watching it, I came to the realization that I know just about all the words to all the songs by the fictional band Zack Attack. I’m ok with this. After the episode, I took the ol’ Google box to see if I could find a clip from the episode to post on my Twitter, because, well, that’s what I do. Instead, I came upon this — the “Saved by the Bell” soundtrack, for sale on Amazon. If scientists ever figure out a way to turn WANT into an alternative energy source, I could have fueled the space program for a decade. But then… oh no…

ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY FIVE DOLLARS?! Holy mother of God. Look, I’m as big a nostalgic ’90s-/Kelly Kapowski-loving sap as there is in the world, but even I have enough self-respect to not blow $100+ on this. Maybe after a couple dozen drinks I could convince myself to get a used copy for $32, but come on, Amazon. You’re killing me here.

One additional note: Do yourself a favor and scroll down to the first review. Amazon user “aizjanika ‘veggie33′” has broken it down by track, with an explanation and personal take on each song, as well as a wish list of songs that weren’t included. Sample quote, “4. Love Me Now — This is a song from the “Rockumentary” episode. This is the song that Zack wrote with Mindy. The rest of the gang was not enthusiastic about this song–neither am I!” I love the Internet so much sometimes.

Below: “Friends Forever.” Don’t act like you don’t know the words.