It’s not some great revelation that Anthony Bourdain is a better human being than Guy Fieri in every way. Bourdain spent three decades working in kitchens before writing an excellent bestselling book that paved the way for his TV show, a travelogue in which he exudes wit and a passion for other cultures. Fieri, on the other hand, achieved fame by winning a Food Network reality show on the strength of his hair product and shirts with flames on them.
So yeah, saying that Bourdain is better than Fieri is like saying that the Coen brothers are better than Michael Bay. Nevertheless, Bourdain only improved his stock by joking on Twitter about Fieri’s stolen Lamborghini:
• Hey, this Lamborghini I “borrowed” is a nice ride!
• But it smells like Ed Hardy in here.
• …and there are naked pictures of Howie Mandel in the glove. Ewww!
• A half eaten nori roll under the seat–and there’s bbq PORK inside! What kind of beast owned this thing!!!
• I probably shouldn’t have had that 5th drink. This is a lot of car…
• Gotta say–this thing handles well off the road!
By the way, that nori roll/barbecue pork joke is a dig at Tex Wasabi’s, a sushi/BBQ restaurant that Fieri opened in 2003. That’s bonus points for going beyond the easy jokes, plus street cred for joking about driving drunk. Is that dude cool or what? I wanna smoke opium in a Thai whorehouse with him.
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At what point does it become uncool to know so much about a loser like Fieri? It’s the difference between skimming a pamphlet and deep reading of a wikipedia article.
I wanna smoke.
I wanna smoke opium.
I wanna smoke opium in a Thai whorehouse.
I wanna smoke opium in a Thai whorehouse with him.
Pyramid of Awesome
That’s excellent.
My only reservation with Bourdain (get it?) is he needs to pick either Anthony or Tony and stick with it.
/only my mother and Thai hookers are allowed to call me Anthony
This is the best thing I’ve read since I heard that Guy’s car had been stolen in the first place. It almost makes me not hate Bourdain for how much better his life is than mine in every facet imaginable.
I watch Tony Bourdain’s show, but he could stand to take the pretentiousness down about five notches.
You know that dumb show on MTV where douchebag high school bullies who think they’re tough get into the octagon with MMA fighters and get the shit kicked out of them? This is the coolness equivalent of that.
“Tex Wasabi’s”? Really? At least “Guitar Wolf” barely speaks English, what’s Guy’s excuse when it comes to naming things?
There’s a “Gone in 60 Seconds” and “Minute to Win It” joke in here somewhere, I just can’t place my thumb on it. I shouldn’t have smoked all that opium with Bourdain earlier.
//rips Tribeca restaurant on blog
Yeah, I loved it but he just knew a little too much about him.
I can’t get past him having the earring. Looks like he got that done at Claire’s.
Of course he knows about him, they are in the same business. I would think its hard for him to not know things about the other few food television hosts.
also bourdain has always been a bad ass, but I can’t help but resent him for being so much better than me.
The earring is bad, but the thumb ring is obnoxious.
Still, I’d follow that man into hell. Or even that abominably shitty Dallas BBQ on West 42nd.
This just reminds me that Fox’s tv adaptation of his book Kitchen Confidential was about five years too early. If that show came out now it would kill. The full season is on HULU and is surprisingly watchable.
AB reminds me of the guys in High Fidelity. He thinks he knows better than everyone when it comes to his chosen field. When really he is just a pretentious douchebag.
I don’t really see Bourdain’s show much but I love his wiseass comments on Top Chef.
It totally makes sense that Brad Cooper played him on a failed TV show.
toMa, if phenomenally non-shitty Q is what you’re looking for, go 4 blocks over to Daisy Mae’s!
I am totally hooked on AB’s show, though Electric Banana has a point; he can come of as pretentious. He is also humbled by ordinary people he meets who have life a lot rougher than his, he is also self-deprecating. Of course his show is about showing cultures and places other than Applebee’s, so he should be knowledgeable.
/thumb ring joke
Oh, I forgot; Guy Fieri should be shot in the face with 12-gauge buck.
The fact he has a Lamborghini in the first place is absolute proof that the world is a cruel and unjust place
Had, Moose. Had. Knowing that it’s past-tense now brings a smile to my otherwise joyless existence.
Now I hope that disgusting truck of his explodes too.
Seeing all the BBQ references from the NY’ers makes me really glad I reside in Fort Worth.
Am I the only one SHOCKED that he had a Lambo instead of a Ferarri modified to spell out his own last name?
This guy is so awesome. No Reservations is pretty insightful while still being totally hilarious. Gotta love this him. And that guy Guy who’s on all those TGI Friday menu’s has ridiculous hair. Like…you look ridiculous.
@0tarin: “Had, Moose. Had” Agreed, that cheers me up also.
/I believe Hadmoosehad was a dish he tried in the new Cambodia show….