Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi was paid $32,000 by the Rutgers University Programming Association to spend 1/24th of a Thursday talking about her hair, fist pumping and something called “GTL,” which I’m going to guess is her finishing move. 32 Large is $2,000 more than the $30,000 the university is paying Nobel-winning novelist Toni Morrison to deliver Rutgers’ commencement address in May. I guess it pays better to be a cow than to write about having sex with one.
I think we could stand to have more reverence for things. When I was in school, I got to meet and speak with Ernest J. Gaines and Sister Helen Prejean. Those are really important, life-shaping memories for me. I can’t imagine where I’d be if I’d spent college snickering to myself about how Colleen from Survivor is speaking at our auditorium and how I totally should go.
If this appearance was anything like her WWE stint, Rutgers dropped 32 grand on the word “bitches” and some arrhythmic Go Daddy spinning-in-place.
Let me put it to you this way; to live on-campus and attend Rutgers University, you have to pay the school (as of right now, according to their website) $23,466 a year. Non-New Jersey residents pay $35,222. If you miss even one monthly payment, less than 10% of that, you breach an agreement with the school and run the risk of losing your credits and being kicked out of the dorms. Trust me, I’ve been in that situation. A school will completely cut you off, change the trajectory of your life and put their foot down about it. Now, imagine that the institution willing to sacrifice you in total for 1900 dollars turns around and gives seventeen times that to a drunk pop culture joke so she can say “Study hard, but party harder!” and make a few thousand people say woo.
Kinda makes you want to say f**k it and write jokes on the Internet for a living, doesn’t it?
[AP]
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I work for Rutgers, and haven’t gotten a raise in three years due to the shit economy. Our department has had a hiring freeze for that duration, and there are talks of potential layoffs to come in the future.
But I can sleep well at night knowing that the little money our school does have is going to cultural institutions like this.
Moral of the story? Toni Morrison needs a better agent.
thats a good point. writing jokes on the internet would be way better than going to school. you ever think of giving that a try yourself?
As a Rutgers grad, I think this is actually a wise move. The school has already received its $80k+ from me, prior to my suicide in ten minutes thanks to this news.
@jaroslav – As the proprietor of funnyjokes.org I take offense to your comment.
It’s the Super Bonus!
Come on New Jersey, this is why we can’t have nice things.
This is same school, mind you, whose women’s basketball team got national coverage when Don Imus and crew refereed to them as “nappy headed ho’s.”
I hate to make shit serious but that’s the best post you’ve ever written.
As a Rutgers student… holy shit. I quit. Seriously. I literally just took a piss in the study lounge of my dorm. Fuck this place.
in that case my apologies. i was unaware of your entire internet oeuvre.
Wow…just wow. I thought Rutger’s was improoving since you hear a lot less about the insane rate of STD transfer there…but now they’re having a complete joke speak to the students? What “wisdom” is she going to share? Maybe she’ll even teach Women’s Objectification 101. But perhaps we’re not giving her enough credit- she did manage to stop having sex with random strangers long enough to learn to work a pencil and write a book.
@Jess
that’s a myth because of an article typo that got blown out of proportion in the media…
but yeah, this doesn’t help
This is pretty typical of colleges. Schools can pay interesting, brilliant, or truly relevant people to come speak to their students all year, but the kids only come out for the stupid garbage.
When I was in college, we had Janet Reno come and give a speech, and the place was barely half full, and most of the attendees were much older people. Clearly not students.
That same semester, Ron Jeremy made an appearance. The auditorium was packed beyond belief.
April Fool’s……PLEASE tell me it’s April Fool’s.
Great funny news on April 1st. We live in a fame driven crazy culture. Good for Snooki, not so good for us… but hey, it is what it is. Cool blog, by the way. ETF Trend Trading
I always mention the same thing as a defense, though — as with any large university — I’m sure the STD trade is prosperous. Snooki being there for an hour certainly doesn’t help the stats.
@Donturtuccio: A bit off topic but in response to your first pissing comment: Tinsley and Brett had a bit of a rivalry, and every weekend the drunk assholes from each dorm would piss on the other dorm. Until we pissed inside Tinsley’s main lounge one night. Winning.
I am now officially embarrassed to live in NJ. Our state school, the place that we as a state trust to educate our young people, just hired an idiot to speak and paid her a ridiculous sum of money to do it. Perhaps the people who made this decision need to go back to school themselves as they are obviously stupid.
You make a good point.
It’s so sad that school is willing to pay this much for nothing but barely seem to actually want to help students.
You live in Brett? I live in… Demarest (not by choice)
@Tiffany, you are just now officially embarrassed?