
MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT
Like Fox and NBC yesterday, ABC unveiled its new fall schedule this morning, revealing a total of 13 new shows (seven in the fall, six more at midseason). Highlights include:
- “Cougar Town” is being held until midseason, where it will move to Tuesdays and help fill the gap between “Dancing with the Stars” seasons. “Happy Endings” will take the post-”Modern Family” slot on Wednesdays.
- Some of the new shows that garnered the most buzz — “Apartment 23″ and “Good Christian Belles,” for example — are also being held until midseason.

- HottieWatch 2011: Minka Kelly in “Charlie’s Angels” will air on Thursdays before “Grey’s Anatomy”; Christina Ricci’s “Pan Am” will follow “Desperate Housewives” on Sundays.
- Tim Allen’s new sitcom, “Last Man Standing,” opens up a new Tuesday comedy block targeted towards male audiences.
- In a surprising move, ABC neglected to give a series order to “Single Female Lawyer.”
The full schedule is below. You can check out detailed synopses of the new shows here (scroll down to see them), if reading PR blurbs about TV shows you’re not going to watch four months from now is your thing.
MONDAY:
8:00 p.m. “Dancing with the Stars”
10:00 p.m. “Castle”
TUESDAY:
8:00 p.m. “Last Man Standing” [New Show]
8:30 p.m. “Man Up” [New Show]
9:00 p.m. “Dancing with the Stars the Results Show”
10:00 p.m. “Body of Proof”
WEDNESDAY:
8:00 p.m. “The Middle”
8:30 p.m. “Suburgatory” [New Show]
9:00 p.m. “Modern Family”
9:30 p.m. “Happy Endings”
10:00 p.m. “Revenge” [New Show]
THURSDAY:
8:00 p.m. “Charlie’s Angels” [New Show]
9:00 p.m. “Grey’s Anatomy”
10:00 p.m. “Private Practice”
FRIDAY:
8:00 p.m. “Extreme Makeover: Home Edition”
9:00 p.m. “Shark Tank”
10:00 p.m. “20/20”
SATURDAY:
8:00 p.m. “Saturday Night College Football”
SUNDAY:
7:00 p.m. “America’s Funniest Home Videos”
8:00 p.m. “Once Upon a Time” [New Show]
9:00 p.m. “Desperate Housewives”
10:00 p.m. “Pan Am” [New Show]



Single female lawyer…havin lots of sex
Happy Endings isn’t getting cancelled. Thats good, right?
I love that they put Modern Family and Happy Endings together.
Everything else? Meeeeeeeh.
And how do they manage to do two seasons of Dancing with the Stars per year? Aren’t they running out of “stars?”
I’m with you Patty. Wake me when it’s not ABC.
The “MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE OUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT” caption can also be used under the Christina Ricci picture.
All those new shows sound awful! It is good news that Happy Endings will be paired with Modern Family. Two very funny shows.
I heard Christina Ricci’s fivehead is getting a co-star credit.
Rumor has it the first episode of Last Man Standing will guest star Larry David and Paul Reiser.
Keep in mind this shit ain’t happening for months.
Kind of like my avatar. Whats with that anyway?
That single female lawyer – always fighting for her clients, wearing sexy mini skirts and being self-reliant
Tuesday night is MAN night on ABC! Tim Allen grunts his way back into our hearts, and then every man’s favorite shows, Dancing with the Stars Results and Body of Proof! ARR! ARR! ARRRRRRRRRRG!?!!!?!!
BRING ME THE ONE THEY CALL…MCNEAL
I’m stoked they’re bringing back “Happy Endings.” Damon Wayans, Jr. is an amalgamation of all the handsomest Wayans features. Except for Kim.
Did we talk about Damon Wayans, Jr, being in two shows on two different networks? “Happy Endings” and “The New Girl”- how is that gonna work?
If I have to sit through “Desperate Housewives” to get to sexy Pan Am stewardesses, I guess that’s what I’m going to have to do, then.
Damon Wayans Jr better get off The New Girl cause holy hell that looks awful.
Damon Wayans Jr better get off The New Girl cause holy hell that looks like attempted rape.
ABC: Bringing the meh since 1948.
Seriously though, they have no super-high concept shows, but a mix comedies and procedurals to go with Dancing With The Stars. They’ll probably win the ratings next year. You fucking wait. Old people be dyin’. CBS can’t hold on to the top spot forever.
If that flight attendant show has less than five minutes of Ricci getting railed in a airplane bathroom before discussing how on how all fixed wing pilots are drunken date rapists I will regard it as an artistic failure.
If that Charlie’s Angels remake doesn’t include five minutes of Minka Kelly talking about how many Maxim editors she blew before people ignored that weird shaped head she has and started calling her hot, I’ll regard it as dishonest.
I guess ABC will continue to be one of my least frequently visited channels.
*Still expects hot woman gifs on this site though (and some hot men gifs for Patty).
And how do they manage to do two seasons of Dancing with the Stars per year? Aren’t they running out of “stars?”
They’ve gotten by the last few years without any stars.
V got cancelled. TOTAL BULLSHIT