Mario Lopez to Host ‘H8R’

Mario Lopez, the “Access Hollywood” host who could only be more unlikable if he hosted the show seated in a backwards chair, will host a new reality show on the CW called “H8R.” Set to debut in the fall, the show will introduce loathsome celebrities to the noble people who hate them.

Lopez hosts H8R, in which celebrities confront their biggest haters and try to convince them that their animosity is misdirected. The CW first ordered a pilot for the project, which featured reality stars Snooki and Kim Kardashian. The pilot has been red-hot at the CW. The network for years has been looking for a new big, loud reality series to join America’s Next Top Model, and I hear the feeling internally is that this might be it. [Deadline]

I hate to admit it, but I can see how this premise could be successful from a narrative standpoint: the hater goes on about how much he hates the celebrity, the celebrity shows up and acts all nice, the hater doesn’t have the balls to be mean to the celeb’s face, and they reach some sort of mutual understanding of human goodness. Ugh. It’s a brilliant and evil plot to make horrible wastes of people like the Kardashians look sympathetic. That’s why I recommend all haters who go on this show to carry a knife and just start stabbing before the celebrity gets a chance to say a word. Not only will it make for great TV, but it should also shorten the episodes considerably.