The MTV Movie Awards were last night, and I did my very best to watch the shiny two-hour commercial for summer films. I have no idea how people with fully-formed brains sit through that thing, because eventually I decided that the commercials during the NBA Finals were less irritating than a horde of teenagers shrieking at the slightest mention of Twilight. And I HATE commercials.
Anyway, here are the highlights that I caught/read about elsewhere:
- Robert Pattinson went off the TelePrompTer while honoring his Water for Elephants costar Reese Witherspoon, resulting in an un-bleeped F-word. Oh no, think of the children or whatever.
- Witherspoon joked about Blake Lively’s nude pictures. You can watch video of that and Pattinson’s slip-up here if you enjoy wasting your life.
- Everyone assumes that Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis are humpin’, so they joked about it and assured us that they aren’t by groping each other.
- Emma Watson’s got a pretty great ass.
- Emma Stone has red hair again. Nice!
- Emma Roberts wasn’t there that I know of, but if she had been I would’ve booed her and demanded more Watson and Stone.
- Justin Bieber has earrings now. He showed up in a bright blue blazer with the sleeves pushed up, thus completing Hollywood’s greatest prank of all time: making teenage girls fall in love with a lesbian from the 1980s.
Ugh. This is such a letdown to write about after the thrilling violence of “Game of Thrones.” What I wouldn’t pay for someone to tear out Bieber’s throat on television.
(banner pic via suicideblonde; inset via the Superficial)
TAGS: AWARDS SHOWS, emma stone, Emma Watson, MTV, MTV MOVIE AWARDS, REESE WITHERSPOON, Robert Pattinson
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This was beneath you Matt. I’m sorry.
I thought your cable was shut off?
I thought your cable was shut off?
I have a girlfriend who has MTV but not HBO.
According to my Canadian Style Guidebook, he’ll have his tongue pierced in 6 years, shortly after he stops wearing Reebok Pumps.
“I have a girlfriend who has MTV but not HBO.”
Matt, I hope she’s not using you for free HBO.
Haha, lesbian from the 80s.. you’re killing me
I’d like to think Justin Bieber is a modern day Just One of the Guys and it’s a woman out to prove she’d be a musical success by impersonating a 16 year old boy.
@Matt
Haha, a girlfriend! I el oh el’ed my ay oh. Such things are beyond us.
The MTV Awards prove that the network is still the voice of this generation.
It also proves that this generation is shit-smeared garbage.
If there hasn’t been a dudesy magazine pictorial/profile of Emma Stone titled “Stone Cold Fox,” then I don’t know America like I think I do.
Wow, Emma Watson DOES have a great ass. Too bad Harry Potter is gay. Or English, one of the two.
I’m pretty sure Bieber was wearing a Foghat shirt. Who the fuck likes Foghat?
Who’s the dude doing the creep on the red carpet tho?
That would be J.J. Abrams, creator of “Lost” and director of this summer’s Super 8.
“That would be J.J. Abrams, creator of “Lost” and director of this summer’s Super 8″
I see he’s using his fame to stalk a hot girl half his age. I applaud his life choices.
That abrams pose is meme-worthy (hint to people who actually know how to use photoshop)
If you banged Emma Roberts, Emma Stone, Emma Watson, and January Jones, would that be hitting for the Emma-cycle?
What I wouldn’t give to see EMMA WATSON tear out Justin Bieber’s throat on television. I’d buy THAT for a dollar.