The MTV Movie Awards were last night, and I did my very best to watch the shiny two-hour commercial for summer films. I have no idea how people with fully-formed brains sit through that thing, because eventually I decided that the commercials during the NBA Finals were less irritating than a horde of teenagers shrieking at the slightest mention of Twilight. And I HATE commercials.
Anyway, here are the highlights that I caught/read about elsewhere:
- Robert Pattinson went off the TelePrompTer while honoring his Water for Elephants costar Reese Witherspoon, resulting in an un-bleeped F-word. Oh no, think of the children or whatever.
- Witherspoon joked about Blake Lively’s nude pictures. You can watch video of that and Pattinson’s slip-up here if you enjoy wasting your life.
- Everyone assumes that Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis are humpin’, so they joked about it and assured us that they aren’t by groping each other.
- Emma Watson’s got a pretty great ass.
- Emma Stone has red hair again. Nice!
- Emma Roberts wasn’t there that I know of, but if she had been I would’ve booed her and demanded more Watson and Stone.
- Justin Bieber has earrings now. He showed up in a bright blue blazer with the sleeves pushed up, thus completing Hollywood’s greatest prank of all time: making teenage girls fall in love with a lesbian from the 1980s.
Ugh. This is such a letdown to write about after the thrilling violence of “Game of Thrones.” What I wouldn’t pay for someone to tear out Bieber’s throat on television.