"Don't hold back, ladies. This is for posterity."
Lenni Todd, a 58-year-old news cameraman for Pittsburgh’s WTAE (an ABC affiliate), was arrested on misdemeanor sexual assault charges after he groped a woman under the guise of filming a story. What follows is the work of a horny criminal mastermind.
Officers said Todd arrived in a station vehicle and had equipment with company logos. However, police said they later learned Todd was off-duty at the time of the alleged incident.
Police said Todd lied to the woman, saying he was going to film her for a story and that part of the story would be shared with the Animal Planet network.
According to police documents, the woman said Todd placed his hand inside her shirt and then grabbed her bare buttocks. Todd is also accused of taking photographs as her shirt was lifted up and as her pants were pulled down. [WPXI]
Don’t take this the pervy way, but MAN do I wish I had been there. Not for the groping, but for that legendary ruse to fondle a woman. “Excuse me, ma’am? I’m from a local news affiliate, and Animal Planet wanted me to record some footage of me groping you. Now if you’ll just lift up your shirt…”
(thanks to Brent for the tip)
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…Todd placed his hand inside her shirt and then grabbed her bare buttocks.
Her buttocks are located in her shirt? Maybe Animal Planet should do a report on her.
“But was she older than 17? Well then I don’t give a fuck”
- Vince
“her shirt was lifted up and as her pants were pulled down.”
Shirt up, pants down is the second best up/down combination after ass up, face down.
“Don’t take this the pervy way, but MAN do I wish I had been there.”
Jesus to the Apostles after receiving the inter-office email with subject line “Re: Sodom and Gomorrah.”
Bloodhound Gang’s The Bad Touch playing the whole time, no doubt. He should have said it was for Discovery.
What’d they arrest him for, being awesome?
Arrested? This man should be made a national hero!
Maybe WTAE should reconsider their “wizard riding a unicorn over a field of naked cherubs” logo.
Somewhere, Carl Monday is furiously taking notes.
OK, now pull your pants down. Yes, Animal Planet specifically said to get some naked butt shots. That’s ok with me lady, lots of women will get naked to be on TV. That’s better. Let me get that dirt off your butt. OK, looking good now.
“They said they wanted to see handprints on the asses. … Look, I’m just reading off the shot sheet.”
Perusing through the Animal Planet lineup, the odds should be set on what show he was filming for:
Fatal Attractions 50/1
Weird, True and Freaky 20/1
Untamed and Uncut 10/1
Monsters Inside Me 5/1
I, Predator 1/100
Otto Man helps us learn; I had no idea who Carl Monday is, so knowing Otto backs up his posts I googled Carl (Googled Carl sound like a euphemism for something). Lo and behold: “Dude caught jacking off at the library” video pops up. Now THAT is reporting.