If Mike Tyson’s show about pigeons (“Taking on Tyson”) wasn’t enough for you, don’t worry, because Animal Planet has added another series to the “fading celebrities with birds” genre. It’s called “Heidi Fleiss: Prostitutes to Parrots,” and the show will be about the former Hollywood Madam’s dark art of turning hookers into macaws. No, not really.
“With her home covered in bird poop and monthly bills for the birds soaring into the thousands, the former madam must balance her need to tend to the birds at home with the necessity of leaving them to earn a living outside of it. With multiple businesses and jobs to focus on, Fleiss spends her days shuttling from the laundromat she owns, to the doggie daycare she is set to open. But, as the anxiety at being away from her birds increases, and the pressure to hire a staff to care for them rises, will the stress of life drive her back to drugs?” [EW]
Ooohhhh, I hope so!
Speaking of drugs, Heidi’s love of parrots — and love of meth — was documented in her appearance on “Celebrity Rehab,” where she admitted to Dr. Drew that she smoked meth just before coming to the show. Man, what a life she’s led. Hookers and parrots and prison and meth and assaulted by Tom Sizemore. That’s spicy livin’. I can’t say that I’ll ever like Heidi Fleiss, but she’s certainly not dull.
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Well how about this. That laundromat didn’t work out, huh? Who could have seen that coming?
She looks like that Skeletor real housewife of NY.
My kind of lady.
(except for the birds)
Even in profile, the work she’s had done to her face is terrifying.
I watched a documentary on Fleiss trying to build a stud ranch in Nevada after she was released from prison. She was pretty much on meth the whole time. It didn’t work out and now it’s laundry and doggy daycare? What I want to know is who keeps giving this woman business loans and how do I contact them?
Why is Stephen Tyler trying to eat that parrot?
She looks like a small mouth bass in that picture.
Otto wins this round, everyone.
If this is what happens to you a decade after Charlie Sheen fucks you, Ducky and the fat kid from Two and a Half Men might as well start digging their own graves now.
I originally heard this announcement and I thought it was a charity thing, like Toys for Tots.
So, when they come up with television shows, does anyone ever ask the question: “Do you really envision anyone watching this show for more than one episode?”
Even cool shows like Ice Road Truckers…how many episodes of this do you think I can watch before I realize it’s the same fucking thing every week? Jesus, if your life is that empty just kill yourself already. I’m starting to think that television is just there for people who are too lazy for suicide.
If you made a map of America using people, she would be Florida.
Also – yes, no, yes.
She’s taken Toucan Sam’s advice of “Follow my nose, it always knows!” far too literally.
She went from taking care of cocks to taking care of parrots.
A round of win for everyone. Well played, boys.
You too, Chino.
A guy found a sleeping Heidi Fleiss in his storage unit that he won at auction on some show and he still didn’t make his money back, poor shit
Polly wants a crack hit.
With all her troubles; poor woman. Not to mention, when that shark ate her face, that was terrible.