Spoiler Alert: Parks And Rec Has Cast Tammy 1

Last we heard from the Parks and Rec department of Pawnee, IN, the Harvest Festival was a hit, Lil Sebastian died, and Ron Swanson’s first wife, Tammy, was waiting in his office. We didn’t see more than the legs of Tammy 1, but her presence was frightening enough to send Tammy 2 running like hell. So who, then, is terrifying and menacing enough to fill those legs?

If you said Oprah Winfrey on the heels of Nick Offerman suggesting that he would love for her to play his character’s first ex-wife, then come on down! Because you’re wrong and you get to wear the penis hat. Tammy 1 will instead be played by a surprising choice.

Casting spoiler alert after the jump.

Patricia Clarkson.

You probably know her best as the woman who wasn’t Susan Sarandon in the ‘Mother Lover’ Digital Short on Saturday Night Live, but you may also know Clarkson from Shutter Island and The Green Mile. But considering how well Megan Mullally has played Tammy 2, I’m a little underwhelmed by this choice. Don’t get me wrong, I have all the faith in the world in the show’s writers, but I feel like they went for a game-tying extra point instead of going for 2 and the win.

After the last episode, my own “Tammy” and I discussed which actresses could play such a malevolent force like Tammy 1, and my first suggestion was Winfrey, just for the star power. For the ironic casting option, I thought Demi Moore would be great (give her a scene opposite Rob Lowe for 80s nostalgia), and for the all-around bitch, they could have tapped the A-list for Julia Roberts, Sharon Stone, Madonna, or Glenn Close. Ultimately, I blame Parks and Recs’ awesomeness for my dashed high hopes.

Thankfully, I know they’ll also prove me wrong.