Forget hurricanes and tornadoes and earthquakes: the surest sign that God is pissed at humanity is the brief nipple slip Nancy Grace suffered on "Dancing with the Stars" last night. In the great scheme of things, it could have been worse: ABC cut away almost instantaneously -- too fast for your eyes to register what's happening.
...but not too fast for a blogger to get screencaps. Sorry, folks: the Internet giveth, and the Internet taketh away. You can't enjoy that much free porn without occasionally getting a peek at Nancy Grace's pepperoni nipple. Actually, pepperoni's not really large enough. Is there another kind of processed meat with a wider diameter? Some sort of meat pancake?
Video below, with images on the following pages. It's all fairly safe for work, but that makes it no less scarring to your psyche.
You were expecting worse, weren't you? Last chance to back out: the unedited screencap is on the next slide.
I blame Casey Anthony for this.
"Between her legs, you will find a new definition of pain and suffering, as you are slowly digested over a thousand years."
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/covers up the words ‘nip slip’
almost there
/covers the words ‘earth with’
Now that’s the headline I wanted to read this morning. If anyone needs me I’ll be bleaching my eyeballs.
“Is there another kind of processed meat with a wider diameter? Some sort of meat pancake?”
I believe the meat you’re looking for is pork roll. And I’ll never be able to eat it again.
McDonalds breakfast sausage patty?
Time for DWTS to fire their costume designer.
Supposedly, after Nancy danced, there were sections of the audience that just sat there in total silence. Somebody’s making The Soup again this week!
Thanks for the Eye Aids, God.
Bologna perhaps? It also makes an apt analogy. I love lunch meat, but bologna makes me cringe. I love seeing nipples, but Nancy Grace’s nipple makes me want to remove my eye balls, pour kerosene in the sockets and stick a roman candle up my nose.
My eyes! The goggles do nothing!
(Salami might be an apt description, but may not be dark enough)
I’m not normally a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman!
This is one of those situations that makes Iran look smart.
I donated to FGB. I read your blogs daily. I will one day buy your book. But there is no way in the name of sweet Corgi Jesus that I am clicking through to that slideshow.
Nightmare fuel!
However, after looking at pic#2, I now want a capicola and prosciutto sandwich with provolone cheese.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOO :’(
Finally…!!!
That headline made me actually laugh out loud. Like, LOUD. God has to make up for Christina Hendricks and Kate Upton somehow. Be glad He is a God of mercy and didn’t make her skirt fly up too.
My dick kind of said it wanted to get hard as there was a nipple on show but as it started to engorge, there was an almighty searing Zeussian lightning bolt pain right through the whole shaft. I think my dick finally gave up on life today. Thanks a fucking lot Nancy Grace and your fucking troll face and fucking cock-breaking nipple-slip.
Tara Reid just started throwing up over the balcony railing.
/that’s not actually related to this story; she’s just here in my hotel room drinking at 8:20 a.m.
It wasn’t easy, but I still managed to masturbate to this.
Matt, you really need to work on getting this in HD.
Of course, I still worked one out to this, but I had to use sandpaper to really make the magic happen.
It’s true. You can’t unsee things. You hear that sound? That’s the sound of all 150 million men in America switching teams. Thanks Nancy. You’ve destroyed the human race.
my finger couldn’t scroll down fast enough…I saw her
Titmom???
I watched this with the sound off (wife is watching something) and the sudden cuts away from Grace and to the audience were brilliantly awful, I laughed.
What a bunch of fags. I’d lick it.