Community (NBC) — Season premiere. John Goodman and Michael K. Williams join the cast. “Community” might not even be the best comedy on its network tonight (“Parks and Rec” is probably a touch funnier), but it’s definitely my favorite. *blows kisses to Alison Brie… and Joel McHale and Donald Glover*
Parks and Recreation (NBC) — Season premiere. NBC’s new Thursday lineup is perfectly laid out: you can watch “Community” at 8, “Parks and Rec” at 8:30, The Office with new boss James Spader at 9, and then ditch out before the execrable series premiere of Whitney at 9:30.
Person of Interest (CBS) — Series premiere. There’s a great pedigree for this show — stars Jim Caviezel, Michael Emerson, and Taraji P. Henson; creator Jonathan Nolan (The Dark Knight); and executive producer J.J. Abrams — and an even greater expectation for it to perform: it’s taking over the time slot that “CSI” owned for the last 38 years. (Followed by: The Mentalist season premiere.)
Prime Suspect (NBC) — Series premiere. Maria Bello wears a hat in the remake of the acclaimed British series. I haven’t seen it myself, but the word on the tubes is that even though Bello’s really good, the show still falls kind of flat. I guess we’ll see.
The Big Bang Theory (CBS) — Season premiere. Back-to-back episodes will ensure that many more people will watch this than the far superior comedies airing on NBC.
Charlie’s Angels (ABC) — Series premiere. Judging by the reviews, this is a spectacular failure: a self-serious bore that can’t even find flattering outfits for its three gorgeous leads — “it’s as if the wardrobe department accepted a dare to see how much they could dowdy up three very beautiful women.” (Sepinwall) That’s unforgivable. I mean, it’s ABC, so I expect the shows to be crappy and tailored to female viewers I couldn’t possibly hold a conversation with, but at least LET MINKA KELLY LOOK HOT.
Grey’s Anatomy (ABC) — Season premiere. *queef noise*
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia/Archer (FX) — Finish your night by watching the Gang go to the Jersey shore and Archer get a little too comfortable as pirate king. One of the shows tonight features fairly explicit gay hobo sex, but I’m not saying which.