Last Man Standing (ABC) — Oh look, Elvira’s still alive. This is not what I was talking about when I said I loved Halloween episodes.
The Real Rocky (ESPN) — ESPN’s documentary about Chuck Wepner, “the Bayonne Bleeder,” a former Marine who was a New Jersey state heavyweight boxing champion. Wepner got knocked out by Sonny Liston and George Foreman before having a career resurgence that led to a fight with Muhammad Ali, against whom he lasted 15 rounds. That fight inspired Sylvester Stallone to write Rocky.
Sons of Anarchy (FX) — Word on the street is that tonight’s episode is the best of the season so far. I admit, I lost my passion for “SOA” for a couple weeks early in the season, so I look forward to this pulling me back in.
The X Factor (Fox) — Yay, live performances. Five of the 17 finalists will be sent home.
Zombies: A Living History (History) — It’s not so much a history of zombies as it is a history of cultures having stories about zombies. Slight difference. Although as zombie histories go, World War Z can’t be beat. That book will rock your face off.
Rachel Zoe Project (Bravo) — Season finale. Bitchface McUnterson takes her newborn baby to work.
Top Shot (History) — Season finale. Wouldn’t it be awesome if the two finalists had to hunt each other down in a sniper duel, like Enemy at the Gates or Carlos Hathcock’s battles with Viet Cong snipers? What? They’re on a reality show. Their lives have no meaning anyway.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Leno kinda trumps everyone else with Barack Obama. Elsewhere: Eddie Murphy on Letterman; Hugh Laurie and Snooki on Kimmel; Abigail Breslin on Fallon; and Zach Galifianakis and Aaron Paul on Conan.