Not as sexy as I imagined.
All things considered, the older members of my family have pretty decent TV-watching habits. My mom can quote “The Simpsons” with the best of them. My uncle has seen every episode “The Wire” and “Curb Your Enthusiasm” and he’s currently catching up on “Doctor Who,” while my aunt loves “Parenthood.” But when I extend the family to include second cousins and aunts-by-marriage and grandparents, things take a turn for the worse, especially during Thanksgiving. That’s when we’re all at a table for a long time, and when the “how are you doing?” conversations run dry, talk often turns to TV — more specifically, to “Two and a Half Men,” “NCIS,” and “Blue Bloods,” and how the Professor Professorson episode of “Community” is the “least funny thing” they’ve ever seen. I already dread the inevitable “2 Broke Girls” banter.
What awful shows does your family talk about during Turkey Day? Do you keep your mouth shut when they discuss “Two and a Half Men”? Or do you tell them that the only half-man worth caring about is Tyrion Lannister on “Game of Thrones”? Dare you defend the honor of good TV? What’s the worst show you’ve ever heard your mother-in-law defend? Thanksgiving might be the only day you’re going to see your entire family until next year’s holidays — why not tell them that “Law & Order: SVU” isn’t nearly as good as they think it is?
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…how the Professor Professorson episode of “Community” is the “least funny thing” they’ve ever seen…
I would probably gouge someone’s eyes out if they told me that, because they obviously aren’t using them.
True story: My Texan grandparents LOVE Walker: Texas Ranger. At least as Cowboys fans they are watching football on Thanksgiving.
Two and a Half Men just about covers it.
My 63-year-old dad loved Two and a Half Men, and what the hell, he’s 63, it’s pretty common that guys his age would be watching CBS like that. I use the past tense ‘loved’ because he proclaimed the other night that the show had become unbearable to watch since “that jackass replaced Charlie Sheen” in reference to the unfunny dumbassary that is Ashton Kutcher. … To defend my dad’s honor, he’s also a faithful viewer of Doctor Who, Mad Men and Boardwalk Empire. And he literally laughed out loud at the end of The Sopranos and said, “Well that’s bullshit.”
Josh, that banner pic is EXACTLY as sexy as I imagined. Hubba hubba.
My in-laws arrived last night and within five minutes my mother-in-law attempted to engage me in a discussion of Two and a Half Men. She also refuses to watch Mad Men because “it glamorizes that era.” She’s never seen an episode.
Also, I got home from work today and they were watching The Ghost Whisperer.
I plan to be the problem tomorrow when I stick them with the Ancient Aliens marathon on History. Beat them to the punch.
My uncle loves The Closer. My mom loves reality shows like Dancing with the Stars and American Idol. I’m pretty sure my cousin doesn’t allow her children to watch TV. My other uncle loves everything that is wrong with television. My dad and wife are the only two I can trust watch good TV, although my wife will dive into a conversation with my mom about reality TV happily. Hopefully football is super exciting, because that will be the only thing we watch.
it’s not the bad shows they watch.. it’s the awesome shows they’ve never heard of like “Sons of Anarchy”, “Breaking Bad”, “Justified”, “Dexter”, etc. Last year my second cousin told me “Louie” was the worst show on TV and I put in exlax in his drink. I don’t care if I was 24 and he was 13. It’s the principle.
And well, fuck people who don’t like “Louie”.
Cliche, I know, but my father will lead the charge on which hour of Fox News is best. The consensus will of course be: all of them.
i mostly have to put up with people talking about reality tv crap.
but, at least my mom loves mad men, my dad used to love married with children, and most of my cousins love the wire, old school simpsons, south park, dexter, walking dead, and workaholics.
but when the convos turn back to reality tv, i turn back to my bottle of whiskey and start screaming at the tv for fantasy pts from stafford, megatron, marshall, and crabtree.
Uncle Gary showing up with a 30 case of Coors already open and wearing the same pink sweater he does every year, and shouting at the football games then to pass out and drool on the couch has always provided enough entertainment for me.
“Fox & Friends.” All conversation at my family dinners should be debunked by Snopes.
My family isn’t as bad as many others, even if they love Alec Baldwin on 30 Rock unironically. I have however been called an asshole in the middle of Thanksgiving dinner for telling my aunt her shitty crime procedurals are just live action Scooby Doo for morons and old people.
Hmmm….this Thanksgiving will be spent in a casino on the Gulf Coast, as almost all of my family is dispersed around the globe. So, any TV talk my father and I get into will be about “Deadliest Catch,” “Gold Rush,” and maybe “Mythbusters.” The crabfishing show is pretty apropos, considering we’ll most likely be eating crab legs at the buffet. The only other TV programming my dad and I both care for is something involving the New Orleans Saints and/or LSU football.
@ LanceUppercut To be fair to Scooby Doo, until recently it was actually a subtle piece of humanist propaganda that insisted, “No, you fucking idiots. Ghosts and monsters and make-believe creatures aren’t real!”
My parents have been trying to get me to watch “Big Bang Theory” for weeks now. I’ve tried telling them that no real nerd would act that way (“A pretty girl is interested in me! I better ignore her and scorn her advances!”). I’ve tried directing them towards the videos of the show with the laugh track taken out to demonstrate how un-funny, and usually creepy, the show really is. It’s a constant reminder of why “Community” never had a shot, which hurts every time they bring it up.
This will be the 4th year in a row that my dad and I will block anything with the word “housewives” in it on the cable box and then change the password without letting my mom know. It’s for her own good.
Also, if I have to sit through one more conversation with my aunt about how Glee is such a boon for marginalized teenagers everywhere, I’m going to say something that will all but guarantee that I am never invited back to Thanksgiving.
My family are all really vanilla-conservative; Mom likes Regis and Kelly and HGTV (and that’s it) while Dad watches Fox News (blech), Bloomberg (double blech) and anything on either the Military or Weather channels.
He’s suprisingly receptive to random good TV shows, though. Over the years, I’ve got him hooked on “Quantum Leap,” “Battlestar Galactica,” “Deadwood” (his favorite show of all time), “Arrested Development,” “Top Gear,” and “Breaking Bad.” His brief summation of why he loves “Breaking Bad” is, I think, the best one; “That goddamn Walter White is a fucking son of a bitch, ain’t he?”
First I dose ‘em, then I describe a magical forest where money is poison and should be flung far from the body. Far from the body into these catch bins that separate faithfulness from evil, for faithfulness in the lesson will ensure acceptance of virtue (shine the light) and acceptance of virtue will cast a powerful light down from heaven which will illuminate the saints (start squeezing the aluminum foil) and the saints will squeak and sizzle like alumin.. uhhh like two quarters rubbing together…
We.. hang on, we need another run through to get this perfect.
My family is drunk by one, so we fight before talking about tv.
OH at Thanksgiving dinner:
“Cake Boss is, like, the only show on TLC that I don’t like”
4:10 p.m. EST, two hours after I arrived, a question from an aunt: “What does everyone think of Two and a Half Men this season?”
I had an argument with my brother in law about Big Bang Theory. Really, he typifies a Big Bang Theory character: convinced he’s smarter than everyone else, can’t keep a woman, and generally annoying. Normally I keep it diplomatic and end with a “hey, you like what you like, and I like what I like” position. With the news about Community – and the fact that I hold Big Bang and it’s fans partially responsible – I was in a spirited mood. It ended with me forcing him to sit at the kid table (I was hosting) until he admitted that – although he’s allowed to like it – Big Bang is a shit TV show.
@ lobsterstuffedwithtacos….i feel your pain i swear parents don’t take no for an answer when it comes to big bang theory…i hate to admit how much i enjoyed the pilot franklin and bash…but come to think of it maybe it was just a stuffing induced dream considering how much godfather 1 and 2 i watched yesterday….bash does bear a resemblence to a young tom hagan
“Big Bang Theory.” Every year, it’s the same conversation. My reply that “I think there’s something else I like that’s on at the same time” is apparently too subtle.
The “C’mon, Man!” segment on NFL Primetime
My dad almost cried when I didn’t come running to his call of, “Frank Caliendo is doing his Madden impression!” When I yelled back that I didn’t want to see a comic I hate do an impression of an announcer that I hate, I’m pretty sure I ruined the entire holiday season.