This video (NSFW audio) is from behind-the-scenes footage of some show called “People Behaving Badly” or something. Whatever. That’s not the important part. In it, a very sassy man in an Elmo shirt gets a ticket. That is also not the important part. The important part is that WHILE getting the ticket, he repeatedly calls the cameraman fat and poor in the most delightfully mean manner possible. I love it so.
This is one of those things that extremely sassy men do better than anyone else. It’s not even close. A meatheaded dolt in this situation would have been all, “Come on, bro. You wanna go, bro? I’m serious bro. I will get out of this car and I will end you, bro,” and it would have been kinda funny I guess, but not as brutal as this. I mean, this guy breaks out the SHARP knives. Especially starting at the 1:13 mark, where he mocks the cameraman’s entire station in life by saying, “I bet you couldn’t afford [a ticket] if you got one, fatass. All you can afford is FOOD with your fat, lazy ass. That’s why you’re out here videotaping. You ain’t even on a real job. Why don’t they have you down there in Oakland filming what’s going on with all the riots and sh-t? They got your fat, lazy, non-relevant, non-factor ass out here filming highway patrol sh-t. That tells you how much you’re worth at your job.” BOOM. DAGGER.
This guy is the best. I want him and Randall from the Honey Badger video to hang out with me all the time and verbally lay waste to my enemies.