Good morning, and welcome to Warming Glow 2.0. On behalf of the staff, thank you for coming here to check out the new, scary world of a Matt-less site. We are all extremely excited to have the opportunity to blabber to you about television in short, 300-word bursts throughout the day, often under a large picture of an animal wearing clothes. Our high school guidance counselors are all very, very proud. I’m sure there will be some minor kinks over the next few weeks, but I promise you that we will do everything in our power to make the transition go as smoothly as possible. We appreciate your calm, rational response to these hiccups, and your willingness to hang in there with us as we figure it all out.
[1000 flaming arrows light up the sky]
But enough about that, let’s get into the most important issue: What does this all mean for you? Allow me to walk you through some of the changes you’ll undoubtedly notice over the next few weeks. As Matt mentioned in his farewell announcement, the site will be staffed by a team of writers instead of headed by one editorial voice. Most of the heavy lifting, at least in the short term, will be done by Dustin Rowles of Pajiba, Warming Glow Listmaster General Josh Kurp, and me, your friendly neighborhood Danger Guerrero. We’ll be using this team effort to bring you not only the same steady diet of TV news, dogs, and GIFs that you’ve grown accustomed to, but hopefully more TV-related features and multi-page posts throughout the week. (Sample: 10 Reasons Jeff from “Saved by the Bell” Was A Total Dingus.) YAY! MORE WORDS!
Lindy West will also be joining the staff as a feature contributor. What we’d really like to do is start an “Ask Lindy” mailbag, where she answers your various television questions. I’m especially looking forward to this because Lindy is, like, a girl. A real one! With ladyparts and everything! EEK! It’ll be very nice to have a new, female perspective on the site, so feel free to send all your questions to her at firstname.lastname@example.org. She is very much looking forward to your queries about Lifetime Original Movies, “Glee,” and whether or not she will send you pictures of her feet. (Note: Please do not do this, creeps.)
Perhaps most importantly, I want to promise all of you that Corgi Friday will not be going anywhere. I will be inheriting the feature, and handling it personally on a weekly basis. It became a beloved aspect of the site under Matt — justifiably so — and it would be incredibly cruel to take that away from you. Those cute, stubby-legged furballs have become Warming Glow’s spirit animal, and they will continue to be a part of the site as long as I have breath in my lungs and a working login. I’ll also be handling the Warming Glow Twitter and Facebook pages, so I’ll be your de facto point man on interaction. We’re still working out access to the Warming Glow tips inbox, so in the interim, you can send tips, stories, or angry diatribes about how we ruined the site to me at DangerGuerrero@gmail.com. (Please do not ask me for pictures of my feet either, creeps.)
In conclusion, thanks again. We’re just as nervous about all this as you are.