Update: The Dutch Are Liars

Yesterday I brought you the disgusting news that two Dutch TV hosts had dined on chunks of each other’s flesh as part of a horrifying experiment/stunt. Well, I can now bring you this comforting update: it was all a sham.

Broadcaster BNN-TV sparked a flurry of online controversy when it released a teaser trailer for Wednesday’s episode of “Guinea Pigs” indicating hosts Dennis Storm and Valerio Zeno would be sampling one another’s flesh after having pieces surgically removed and prepared by a chef, DutchNews.nl reported.

However, the network revealed Wednesday the events of the episode were a hoax designed to raise awareness of a shortage of organ donors, a British tabloid, The Sun, reported. [UPI]

Well that’s certainly a relief. It turns out the Dutch are just filthy liars. But it does raise an important issue: what else are they lying about? Now that they’ve copped to being dishonest, how can we take their word for anything ever again? For all we know, they’re lying about lying about eating their fellow man. Maybe that’s just part of their sick plan to lull us into a false sense of security so they can capture us and feed their cravings for human flesh on our delicious braised American rumps. You know, now that I think about it, that sounds EXACTLY like something a group of maniacal cannibals would do. “Oh no, we didn’t really eat each other. We were just kidding. Haha, we make a joke. We are quite funny, yah? Why don’t you come over and we’ll have you for dinn– I mean, we’d love to have you over for dinner.”

That’s how they get you. I’ve seen it a million times.