There’s other TV news going on today, but I’ve had this video bookmarked for a while and we need to talk about it (the embedding is disabled, which is infuriating). It comes courtesy of delightfully-named commenter Mutant Turd, who brought it to my attention in last week’s post about Joel McHale’s appearance on “Sesame Street.” While the subject matter may be a little inside baseball for people who never lived in Seattle in the late 90s, the essence of McHale’s style is still there: biting sarcasm delivered with a mischievous smile. It’s like watching home video of LeBron James dunking in his driveway at age 15. But as cool as it is to see one of your favorite performers spreading his wings in an early local television appearance, that is not the story here. The story here is Joel McHale’s hair. Oh, honey. Oh, no.
While I’m very glad Joel has apparently since purchased the Jeremy Piven Hair Restoration System and acquired some sculpting goo, balding on top with hair down to your shoulders is not a good look. To be honest, I don’t even blame him. I blame the 90s. Fun fact: From 1989-1997, a grand total of six smart hair-related decisions were made in the entire world. We should hold barbers and hairdressers responsible for the things they let people do to their heads during that period the way we do bartenders who over-serve someone. I mean, I walked into a barbershop at age 12 and asked for a flat-top with lightning bolts shaved into each side of my head, and the barber JUST GAVE IT TO ME. LIKE I WAS A RAPPER OR SOMETHING. And there are pictures of this travesty prominently displayed in the homes of my relatives.
I’m filing a class action. Call me, Joel. We’ll make those bastards pay.