Oprah Is In Trouble With the Nielsen People

Last night during the Grammys, Oprah took to Twitter to beg her followers to switch to her fledgling network, OWN. The since deleted tweet read, “Every 1 who can please turn to OWN especially if u have a Neilsen box.” Putting aside the fact that a billionaire television mogul apparently doesn’t know how to spell the name of the idiotic group that records television ratings, the tweet was also bad form because, apparently, begging for Nielsen viewers is a big no-no.

As Deadline noted, networks are not allowed to specifically target Nielsen subscribers. It’s policy prohibits “attempts to single out panel members … to change their viewing habits.”

“In accordance with our policies and procedures, Nielsen is reviewing this incident with our clients and we may withhold, breakout and/or make a note in the ratings,” a Nielsen rep told EW.com. “We take any violation of our policy seriously and will work with clients to resolve the situation.” [EW]

“Oh. Okay,” said Oprah, while lounging in a platinum bathtub filled to the brim with diamonds that were harvested from her personal mine by talk show hosts she’s vanquished over the years, and slowly being fed grapes and fanned by a diverse team of zoo animals that have been trained — at great personal expense to her — to do these kinds of things. “I’m very sorry for my mistake.” She then fired off a series of angry emails, each more forceful than the last, instructing her team of lawyers to do things like “Buy Neilsens” and “Declare OWN #1 People’s Most Important Network” and “Kill Donahue.” When she was done, she threw her phone into a fountain of champagne and retired for the day. Ruling an empire is exhausting. Her eminence needs rest.