In an interview with E! earlier this week, “Parks and Recreation” executive producer Michael Schur confirmed what everyone who saw last’s week “Operation Ann” episode already assumed: “It's real. Tom and Ann are dating and will have a relationship for some amount of time."
So, it’s definitely happening, but is it a good thing? I’m onboard with Tann? Aom? PerkFord? because, as Schur said, "We have a lot of soul-matey relationships…and we just wanted to do a comedy relationship.” Yay comedy, boo love. It also gives both of them something to do (which has occasionally been a problem, especially with Ann) in the post-Entertainment 720/dating Chris Traeger-era of the show.
But just because seemingly every “Parks” character has hooked up with every other “Parks” character at some point (I can’t wait for the inevitable Ron/Donna fling to happen), that doesn’t mean every show should just start pairing characters all willy-nilly like. Here are 10 romantic relationships on other shows that should never by no means ever happen. Happy Valentine's Day, no one!
From the mouth of a babe: Tina Fey has said time and time again that Liz and Jack will never hook up, even if he bought her all the off-brand Mexican cheese puffs her heart desires. Good. They have a great relationship as is, and if they ever did get together, it would be a disgrace to six seasons worth of near-perfect characterization. Put Frank and Jenna together (again) – they both kind of suck, might as well suck together.
During “Pool Party,” while Jim’s taking a Robert California-guided tour of his house, Cathy needs a Chicken Fight partner and she desperately wonders where Jim is. She’s Pam’s pregnancy replacement in the office, and although Jim and Pam aren’t nearly as charming as they once were (or as they think they still are), it would still be a disgrace for her to become Pam’s replacement…in Jim’s heart. (/blow heads off). Why are the writers even hinting at a fling between Cathy, who’s barely a character, and Jim? Sometimes I think the “The Office” has forgotten how to tell an effective story.
“Happy Endings” has recently hinted at a Dave and Alex reunion, but I like them better as friends. Without benefits. There’s no reason to disrupt the chemistry the cast has as is. Even though Alex is my favorite character on the show, I wouldn’t want another couple to compete with Brad and Jane. They rule.
If the last two seasons of “Curb Your Enthusiasm” have taught us anything, it’s that Larry David works better alone. Or at least without a wife/serious girlfriend. Seasons seven and eight have been the show’s best, partially because the show had run out of Cheryl/Loretta getting agitated at Larry stories. No disrespect is intended towards Cheryl Hines (who’s great on “Suburgatory”) and Vivica A. Fox; it’s just that the show found new momentum by having Larry date an array of women (and trying to woo Cheryl back, only to not want her when he does). Plus, he’s never gonna love someone as much as he does Jeff.
Because it’s more in-character and painfully funny (painful and funny?) to think he’s waiting for her after “New Jersey/Airport” and for them to not get together, than it is for him to wait her and for them to finally hook up. We don’t want to be robbed of moments as hilariously cringe-worthy as when he fu*ks up taking a bath with her. That would rob “Louie” of being “Louie.”
Or, I don't want them getting back together. Producers have dropped few hints about what's to come for season two of "Homeland," but they have said, "Brody and Carrie have only just begun, and there's an enormous amount unresolved." I hope that doesn't mean they're going to sleep together again, because that would be disastrous from a show that didn't have a single big misstep in its first season. Restrain yourself, “Homeland.”
I know it’s going to happen because the show has building toward Jess and Nick hooking up practically since episode one, but that doesn’t mean it’s the right decision. “New Girl” has recently found its footing and has settled into a nice comedic groove, and it’s far too easy for the Will They, Won’t They angle to screw up everything. Also, I might be jealous of Nick. Maybe.
Rachel and Tim are awesome, but “Justified” already has an abundance of awesome. Rachel and Tim ever getting together would detract from all the other awesomeness.
To recap: Rachel and Tim, awesome; Rachel <3 Tim, not awesome.
Oh wait, this is couples we wouldn't want to see together. But imagine if "2 Broke Girls" actually got rid of the subtext and Max and Caroline just decided that sure, they're gay, why not? The ratings would skyrocket — and perverted chef Oleg would have a heart attack...Maybe this isn't such a bad idea.















Jack/Liz would DESTROY that show. Period.
Unless it is done in a dream sequence…
Totally acceptable in a Liz dream sequence, if she can manage to get rid of her boyfriend, astronaut Mike Dexter.
If we’re seriously saying there is an appropriate time to have a Jack/Liz hook up, then I should get my Jack vs Ron Swanson crossover.
Shit, now I’m gonna have a Kat Denning/ Beth Behr Lesbian porno going off in my head all day. Fuck you very much, Josh. My boss already thinks I’m an unproductive lump as it is.
Also, Franklin and Bash
*Fist pound*
Bro.
Bro, duh bro
Two bros…being bros….together…bro love.
I’m going to assume you are talking about a deeper exploration into their bromance because bro, bros pound each others fist, not each others butts.
Either way, I disagree, the exploration (exbroation?) of the bonds of being a true bro (bronds?) is never a bad idea.
Ann and Tom makes me very upset. Poor decision.
I just want DJ Roomba in the mix
Umm aren’t we forgetting someone in the mix here? A lil Jean Ralphio will make everything better.
Jean Ralphio’s busy with that other show right now. But if this couple thing brings him back to us, then do it, dammit.
Agreed. I can see where it’s coming from with the whole “they never have anything to do” angle, but it seems that Schur’s failsafe is to just put everyone in a relationship. (Holy God. I just half-assedly criticized Ken Tremendous. That hurt.)
30 Rock and Parks and Rec do the random guests better than anyone. Hell, P&R does the random characters better than anyone. We don’t need to answer the question nobody has been asking.
Also, Happy Endings has a strange tendency to hint and leave hanging, because they also hinted at Dave and Penny and then gave them the strange bro and sis setup.
I wish Happy Endings would get rid of Penny all together. Her characters is painful to watch and almost makes me leave the show before the gay or black make me laugh again.
I figured the brother/sister relationship would prove super awkward making them realize that they do have feelings for each other.
My favorite “wrong” relationship was when Alex was really into Max because he was good at kissing.
I like Penny, but Dave/Penny would be way too random. I almost wonder if they weren’t screwing with us, since the scene was at least partially a parody of predictable romantic comedies.
Dave/Penny=worst idea ever. I’d put them on this list over Dave and Alex.
The fact that they did it the very next episode after teasing Dave/Alex feelings… crap on them.
It’s weird to me that some fans actually want Jack/Liz to happen, even though the show makes it very clear that it will never happen. Like a man and a woman can’t have an interesting relationship without romance, right? God forbid!
And, yes, Brad and Jane are the best.
A year ago I thought I’d never have to say this, but here we are: Dexter and Deb. *shudders*
How about Jonathan Smith and Mark Gordon from Highway to Heaven? Watching them bump uglies would make the entire truck stop burn to the ground.
I’m only vaguely aware of what the hell you’re talking about.
Also, what is going on over at the New Girl casting office? Eva Amurri, Lizzy Caplan, Hannah Simone… I wonder if this show is some kind of scam by some casting director or EP to nail every underrated hot girl in Hollywood.
That’s it! New Girl is just using human crochet Zooey Deschanel as cover to run a casting couch operation.
I cannot be the only one who wants Jenna to get back together with “GenderdysmorphicBigenitalianPansexual” partner, Paul L’Astnamé – can I?
Spongebob and Patrick – it is inevitable.
I’m pretty sure that echinoderms and multi-cellular porifera aren’t allowed to get married in Florida.
Spongebob and squidward. There’s all that tension. And the number of tentacles match the number of holes
How about Rebecca and Diego from Alcatraz? It feels like a long shot, but you know how network dramas are with guy/girl partnerships.
No. JUST NO! I like Alcatraz without the romancy stuff. I almost shit myself when Peter/Olivia got together on Fringe and if they hadn’t done that whole Olivia Switch, it would’ve made that entire relationship unpalatable.
I’m giving the show a chance and trying to like it…so, just no.
As much as I like Hurley, he is F’ing enormous right now. I like the show, but everytime I see him I am afraid he is going to die of a heart attack or something.
What happened to Ron and Ann? I won’t believe she didn’t go for a mustache ride after the Halloween episode.
Don Draper telling Peggy Olsen that his (gorgeous) new fiancee reminded him of her was the biggest burn ever – on that show. It’s pretty much like saying that you would totally be into her if she wasn’t such a dog.
Sam and Diane.
Look what they done to my show… Maw!
Gordon Jump and Dudley.
I still have psychological baggage because of that episode.
I’d add any relationships on Community. I love that the show deliberately goes in the face of the usual will they / won’t they tropes that hack writers use to create emotional investment in a 22 minute comdey. The scene from season 2 where Jeff runs through the rain, presumeably to Annies, but to actually show up at Rich’s door just to find out how he can pretend to be a good guy in order to get over on people was outstanding.
Agreed. Although, maybe Evil Jeff could date Evil Britta and Evil Annie simultaneously.
Honestly, i think the Office actually got that one right When you work in an actual office, there are ALWAYS people having affairs and people who wanna screw other co-workers even though they’re married, etc., etc.
Then again, I AM rather handsome.
This makes it onto the “Top 10 Top Ten Lists That Should Never Happen”…welcome to the fold, gent.
I would have gone with Lois and Quagmire, but who am I kidding, we all want to see them bang.
Rachel Brooks and Tim Gutterson seems like a reach. I’ve never seen any hint or inclination of a romance between those two. One potential match up that should be on the list is Travis and Laurie on Cougar Town. Though Travis and Laurie, mostly her, have decided that it should never happen it doesn’t mean it might eventually happen.
If Peggy and Don ever hook up I will personally drive over the cast of Mad Men in a lawnmower.
I agree but only because I recently found out that Astrid on Fringe was Gay and it’s made me dead inside.
Was just going to post that sentiment. Holy shit what an awful idea.
Agreed about Rachel and Tim on Justified. Don’t touch ANYTHING about that show. It’s my very favorite thing on TV right now.
Cyril and Malory. ISIS would never be the same.
That already happened while writing “Mandingo 2: The Enslavening”.
Well hump me…didn’t know that. I blame Netflix for not having the decency to put season 2 in their online lineup.
Louie and Pamela must get together!@!!!!
Is it just me or is Pam Adlon the most non-hot hot chick ever? She seems like the chick that if you knew her she’d be kinda “meh,” but for some reason I just think she’s smoking.
Dexter and Deb Morgan.
This should have been number 1.
Make more sense than saying hot lesbians are bad, because they’re not, ever.
The way the characters on Archer are hooking up we should see a Mallory/Archer hookup any day
The Anne/Tom relationship is ridiculous because we all know that it’s only a matter of time before Anne and Leslie are mowing each other’s boxes.
They already teased the Kathy and Jim hook up possibility last night on The Office.
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