A few weeks ago, MTV announced that they were doing a reboot of “Hollywood Squares” featuring rappers and MTV personalities. This, to be perfectly clear, seemed like a great idea. The only problem was that the original announcement included phrases like “starring Nick Cannon and Bam Margera,” which is kind of like offering to cook someone an omelette and then filling it with napkins instead of cheese. It’s just not acceptable, and there’s no reason we have to stand for it.
Then last week, the New York Times did a behind-the-scenes story on the show, and I am pleased to announce that I am 100% back on board. Why, you ask? Two words: Ghostface Killah. The article is riddled with Ghostface quotes and anecdotes (again, in the NEW YORK TIMES), and I don’t think I’m being unreasonable when I say someone should issue an emergency Pulitzer to everyone involved in this groundbreaking piece of journalism. I’ve collected some of my favorite quotes after the jump, including Ghostface’s words of wisdom to “Community’s” Donald Glover, and his thoughts on game show theme songs. The man is a national treasure, and I refuse to hear otherwise.
“Why you got to ask me that, that’s disrespect,” Fat Joe responded to a question about what kitchen utensil a pig’s private parts most resemble. A contestant who wrongly doubted the veracity of an answer provided by Ghostface Killah was quickly chided: “You should always trust the Wizard of Poetry.”
First of all, the idea of Fat Joe going on an MTV game show and then refusing to answer a question because he considered the subject matter disrespectful is hilarious on a number of levels. But, more importantly, as of about five minutes ago, “You should always trust the Wizard of Poetry” is going on my tombstone.
[Ghostface] did have one concern. “They should have some real nice music” for the theme song, he said. “Like when you hear ‘Pyramid’ ” — he sang the theme song for “$20,000 Pyramid.” “You know what I mean? Everybody knows ‘The Price is Right.’ ” He sang that one. “What is this one going to be? Something that’s” vehemently — he used a different word — “unique.”
But he was having fun on the set, he added. “Everybody’s loose, that’s what makes it so good,” he said. He let out a stream of profanities, gleefully, naturally. “Whatever you want to say, you just say it,” he added, “That’s why I say it feels real.”
To recap: Ghostface Killah has strong feelings and a depth of knowledge about game show theme songs, and he has no qualms about firing off a “gleeful” and “natural” stream of profanities in front of a reporter for the New York Times. Ghostface is the best.
[Donald] Glover, whose rap name [Childish Gambino] comes from the Wu Tang name generator, also said that meeting Ghostface was a highlight. “I came in, and he was like, ‘Hey, what’s up son,’ and we dapped, and he was like, ‘Yo, keep making that money, do it!’ ” marveled Mr. Glover, best known as a star of the NBC comedy “Community.” “That was really cool. I didn’t even think he knew who I was.”
If I ever meet Ghostface Killah, God willing, I want our first interaction to go EXACTLY like this. “Yo, keep making that money, do it!” “Thanks, Ghostface! I’ll try!”
Ghostface Killah had also been relegated to the bottom row at the start of taping, but complained and was moved up to a middle corner.
“Nobody puts Ghostface in the bottom row” is the new “Nobody puts Baby in a corner.” This show sounds amazing. I just hope MTV doesn’t trip all over themselves trying to ruin it.
RELEVANT AND NSFW: Ghostface Killah’s amazing ODB story.