
Here is the complete list of things that will result in me doing a post about “Dancing With the Stars”:
- Attractive female contestant falls out of dress
- Someone does the Turk Dance
- A cast member from a ’90s television show aimed at children or teens is announced as a contestant
- Same as above but with DMX or Coolio or any member of the Wu-Tang Clan or Boyz II Men
- Female dancer attempts tricky dance move and her stiletto flies off and stabs an audience member in the throat
- That Bruno guy finally snaps while judging a performance and just, like, whips out his ding-a-ling or something
- Tom Bergeron gets fired and is replaced with an animatronic panda named Bamboo
- Someone poops and/or pees their pants
- A spaceship lands on the roof of the studio and the aliens come inside and start vaporizing audience members with a space laser
- NFL player wins the whole shebang and starts rolling around the stage like he’s on fire
So, here you go.
GIF via



This is why the NFL needs to ease off on that whole “excessive celebration” thing.
Tom Bergeron should have thrown a flag there.
I was going to shame you with #1, asking if posting about Nancy Grace’s nip slip means you think she’s attractive, but that was Matt. Oh, memories…
cue the ‘oh no you didn’t’ nancy grace gif from this show.
Actor, comedian, rapper, dancer..is there anything Childish Gambino cant do?
lol wut?
Donald DRIVER…Donald GLOVER. Let me guess, they all look the same to you right?
It was a joke…
Sorry, had a feeling, but my synapses are as week as my coffee today. Fucking Coyotes. Carry on.
I was more saying that no one watching DWTS probably knows who Driver is and probably thought he was the guy off Community because their names are similar. Not exactly high concept joke telling, but I’m glad I had to explain it to you.
Ufford is gone bro, and he aint never coming back…try enjoying someone else’s shit without bringing up someone else…
CTFO, bro.
I’m pretty sure I have the same order-of-importance on viewing such posts too.
upvoted (in spirit at least) for great Scrubs reference as well as an impressive use of animatronics
I don’t have a blog, but if I ever saw anyone do the Turk Dance in real life I would start a blog just to post about it.
I bet she shags like a minx.