‘Franklin & Bash’ Recap: Sh-t Was Weak, Bro

OTHER SH-T AND STUFF

- Apparently Hot Cop from last episode was not just a slut that Bash was going to bang once and be done with because SHE IS BACK and drinking White Russians at parties and providing sage advice like “Slow your roll” and looking HOT as hot cops are WONT TO DO. I guess she is Bash’s girlfriend now which I am conflicted about because on one hand she is hot and likes to party but on the other hand having a girlfriend will probably cut down on the amount of strippers he is allowed to have in the hot tub. This is a classic dilemma facing bros everywhere so it is very realistic and important and also at the end of the episode Bash’s mom texted her from his phone and told her to come over wearing a skirt and no underwear so she could bone him and she did so SHE IS TOTES A KEEPER IT SEEMS.

- Speaking of chicks Bash used to bone, Sexy DA called off her wedding to James Van Der Beek because of a monsoon or something and also she is blonder than she was last season so these are both developments we will need to keep an eye on.

- Middle Eastern Bro went to meet that girl he had a crush on in college that they talked about last episode but instead of being smooth like “Sup, I’m the Middle Eastern Bro. Do you like Patron?” he was all “I AM STRANGE AND I LIKE YOU HI P.S. I AM KIND OF STALKING YOU,” which is not a very good approach but GUESS WHAT it worked. Sort of. It turns out College Chick is just as crazy as he is but a different kind of crazy where she has low self-esteem and bangs lots of dudes (DIBS!) so they are going to see Wise Old Bro Lawyer Bro’s psychiatrist and try to get all that ironed out which is dumb because (a) his problem is that he doesn’t like to go outside and (b) her problem is that she loves to bone, so she could just come over and they could bang in his room. PROBLEM SOLVED

- Bros. Did you know there is a “Franklin & Bash” Vegas travel package. Ladybro reader Jen informed me of this and I clicked on the link and it is called the “Bashover VIP Package” which is important because it is both a reference to The Hangover and also a great name for [points to groin] MY DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE, BROS. It comes with Criss Angel tickets! HOW COULD THIS NEWS POSSIBLY BE ANY BETTER?! I vote we all book a trip together and do Vegas in style like the bros and ladybros of leisure that we are. FIELD TRIP.