After many months of C-Tates GIFs and Matthew McConaughey "alright alright alright" impressions, Steven Soderbergh's Magic Mike, which aims to legitimatize strippers the way Ed did for baseball-playing monkeys, will be finally be released tomorrow. We here at Uproxx couldn't be more excited, and if you haven't been keeping abreast (apenis?) of Film Drunk's daily updates, please rectify (don't turn that into a pun) that now.
But because Magic Mike is a movie — and WHAT a movie if critics are to be believed — Warming Glow hasn't been able to talk about it much. That doesn't seem fair, so to make things equal, we've put together a list of some of TV's most memorable scenes involving stripping.
Throwing money at your computer screen is appreciated. We're trying to make our way through college.
Gob Bluth was once a member of the Hot Cops, a group of male dancers dressed up as police officers, until he was nearly shot to death after showing up at the wrong apartment. He still loves to strip, though, and never misses an opportunity to rip his pants off, even in front of his brother. Plus this:
Magic Mike: 20 years later.
In "The Office" episode, "Ben Franklin," Michael instructs Jim and Dwight to hire strippers for Bob Vance's warehouse bachelor party. While Jim looks for a Ben Franklin impersonator instead, Dwight does what he's told and books the tastefully named Elizabeth the Stripper. During the party, Michael's all ready to receive a lap dance from her, but says no at the last second — he has a girlfriend, after all, and now he must decide whether he should tell Jan or not. Elizabeth's response, "Secret secrets are no fun, secret secrets hurt someone."
A stripper with a heart of gold, brains of some other element, and a nice...face. Yeah, face.
To call this the best scene from "House of Lies" isn't giving it enough credit. "House of Lies" wasn't very good. This, on the other hand, is very good. Feel free to make "other other hand" jokes at your leisure.
"Those titties are her blabbermouth." Exactly, Leon. Exactly.
Larry David would be the worst person to go to a strip club with, right? "I mean, they've already got the chicken fingers — why not just go all the way and include some sauce on the side? What's the point of a chicken finger if there's no honey mustard sauce. I can't think of anything better in the world than watching a young woman strip while eating chicken fingers covered in honey mustard." In my mind, Larry David really likes his sauces.
"Pole Fitness for Jesus," NEVER FORGET.
I still have yet to see an episode of "Fringe," but this feels like a memorable scene.
Actual Yahoo! Answers question: "Would you hire Danny DeVito to strip at your friends bachelorette party?" The best response: "If I had a friend." Haha, loneliness. Honestly, the cop outfit doesn't do much for me, but were DeVito to come dressed as Dr. Mantis Toboggan...
Watch the full strip scene here (stupid unembeddable video).
This clip, from "The Drew Carey Show," SCREAMS 1997, when The Full Monty was a Thing.
I love Road House. I love Point Break. I love Red Dawn.
This is Patrick Swayze's best role.