Damages (DirecTV, 9 p.m.) — Final season premiere. The greatest show that NO ONE ever talks about? Discuss. Also, the fact that Jenna Elfman is still working makes me furious.
Dogs in the City (CBS, 8 p.m.) — Season finale. Goodbye, show that I assume consists of nothing but well-dressed dogs talking about orgasms while drinking margaritas from bowls. Actually, that sounds great.
Who the (Bleep) Did I Marry? (ID, 9 p.m.) — The Kim Kardashian Story.
ESPY Awards (ESPN, 9 p.m.) — If Sean Rash doesn’t win Bowler of the Year, I will make whoever is in charge of that decision drink the foot sweat from Kevin James’s shoes. But seriously, Cam Newton should have been nominated for Best NFL Player over Terrell Suggs. I might be biased.
Futurama (Comedy Central, 10 p.m.) — Leela’s mom starts dating Zapp Brannigan. Sounds like a sexy problem.
LATE NIGHT GUESTS: Bryan Cranston (!!!) and R.A. Dickey (!!!) on Letterman; Morgan Freeman on Leno; Wanda Sykes and Joel Kinnaman on Kimmel; and Elijah Wood, Freida Pinto, and James Murphy on Fallon.
I want more like this!
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