Jean-Ralphio From ‘Parks & Rec’ Is Voicing A Teenage Ninja In A Disney Channel Cartoon

We don’t talk a lot about Disney Channel shows here on the UPROXX network. This is not to say that they’re of substandard quality or that they don’t serve a purpose in the television landscape, it’s just that, by and large, they don’t move the needle for our target demographic. All that is subject to change, however, if they — oh, I don’t know — make a cartoon about a teenage ninja that features the voices of Jean-Ralphio from Parks & Rec (Ben Schwartz), Dean Pelton from Community (Jim Rash), and Ron Swanson’s real-life wife (Megan Mullally). That would be something we’d probably cover here. What’s that? Oh, they did? That’s terrific news!

In Randy Cunningham; 9th Grade Ninja, Schwartz plays a high school freshman who discovers the “NinjaNomicon,” an 800 year-old Ninja guide book. Now Randy, with the help of his best friend Howard, must battle evil while navigating high school and keeping his secret identity a secret.

Schwartz (whose credits also include House of Lies) stars with Andrew Caldwell (Hannah Montana) as Howard Weinerman; Kevin Michael Richardson (The Penguins of Madagascar) as Willem Viceroy III; John DiMaggio (Futurama) as Hannibal McFist; and Dave Wittenberg as Bash Johnson.

Randy Cunningham: 9th Grade Ninja also stars Community’s Jim Rash as Principal Slimovitz; Tim Curry (The Rocky Horror Picture Show) as The Sorcerer; Megan Mullally (Will & Grace) as Mrs. Driscoll; and John Oliver (The Daily Show) as Coach Green. [TV Guide]

I don’t think any of you realize how badly I want to go back in time and take this show with me so I can watch it through my 8-year-old eyes. At this point in my life I’m afraid I may be too cynical and jaded to enjoy it, but back then I would have eaten this sucker up like a pack of Dunkaroos. I loved ninjas — 3 Ninjas, Surf Ninjas, Teenage Mutant Ninjas Turtles, etc. “GIVE ME ALL OF THE NINJA THINGS” I probably shouted at a very confused mall Santa Claus at some point. It was serious, and this show — based on the preview clips in the TV Guide story — would have definitely been in the rotation.

Anyway, the point I’m getting at here is this: Make all your dumb wiener kids and nephews and nieces watch this show, and have them write me a thank you note when they’re done.